My rich neighbour just had a private ice rink built!

I said to him "Can I have a go?" and he said "Yeah, but it'll cost you a dollar"

I thought: what a cheap skate.

So a man was walking up to the ice rink during the Winter Olympics...

wanting to get a closer look at the ice skaters. He ends up slipping onto the rink, and he starts to catch himself as he is falling. Yet, somehow to his amazement he keeps a running fall up, and ends up spinning to the middle of the ice rink. He is slightly frazzled, having almost face planted on th...

Why are the corners of ice rink rounded and not 90°?

Because if they were then the ice would melt

A man decides to visit Germany with his dog for 2 weeks.

He wishes to experience German culture during the winter. So, he visits an ice rink. As soon as the man steps foot on the ice, the dog darts forward, excited about his new surroundings. The dog proceeds to fall through a thinner patch of ice. The man leaps forward to save his dog, but another man di...

There’s one place that I just can’t stand.

My local ice rink.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

God is that you?

A friend of mine loves to ice fish so he packs up his gear and tent and drive for a bit. He sets up his tent on the ice and pulls out his ice auger. He starts to drill into the ice and he hears a big booming voice say There’s no fish under the ice!
A few minutes go by and he starts drilling in a...

A Man Decides to go Ice Fishing

One day, a man decides to go ice fishing. He grabs his gear and heads out onto the ice. Once he finds a suitable spot he cuts a large hole in the ice and sits down.

An hour passes and he still hasn't caught anything. Another hour passes, and then another, and still no fish. Suddenly the man ...

Ole and Sven grabbed their poles and headed out to do some ice fishing.

As they were augering a hole in the ice they heard a loud voice from above say, "There are no fish under the ice." Ole and Sven moved about 25 feet over and started to make another hole. The voice said a little stronger, "There are no fish under the ice." They both looked around and then looked up. ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A pot-heads ice-fishing experience.

A stoner wants to learn about ice fishing. So he gathers all the needed equipment and makes his way to the closest frozen ice. He goes about 20 feet out and drills a hole in the ice. "There's no fish there!" Booms a voice. The stoner shrugs and moves a further 50 feet out and drills another hole. "T...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two Polachs Go Ice Fishing [long]

As their using their auger to cut a hole to drop their lines they hear a voice from above.

“There’s no fish down there.”

After hearing that they decide to move about ten yards further down, and proceed to cutting a hole in the ice. Once again they hear the same voice call out.
...

A blonde wanted to go ice fishing,

So after getting all of the right tools, she headed toward the nearest frozen lake.
After getting comfy on her stool she started to cut a circular hole in the ice. Then from the heavens a voice boomed, ''THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.''

Startled, the blonde moved further down the ice, p...

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