What did French Humpty Dumpty say when he fell?

Oeuf.

One day in October, Humpty Dumpty went to the clothes store...

He picks out a nice sweater, a couple pair of socks, a coat, etc. He pays for them and leaves. He heads out and goes to get groceries, and buys milk, eggs, tuna fish, matches, and a single pumpkin. On his way home now, he sees a stray cat in the cold. Feeling charitable, he offers it some tuna fish,...

Top joke in my second grade class this week: Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall?

To make up for his miserable summer.

Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn?

Because Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.

Santa gives humpty presents

Why did santa gave humpty a present

Cause he is a good egg

I’m not sure if “Humpty Dumpty” is a good nursery rhyme or not...

... I’m kinda on the fence about it.

Why did Humpty Dumpty push Ms. Humpty Dumpty off the wall?

To see her crack.

Am I the only one who finds the story of Humpty Dumpty....

...a bit too egg centric?

What's the difference between Humpty Dumpty and the year 2020?

One of them had a great fall.

Have you heard of this Humpty Dumpty guy?

He's not all he's cracked up to be; I heard he had a breakdown or something. His life is in pieces and feels like it's just one big yolk, now.

Humpty Dumpty, grumpy parent edition

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,

Humpty Dumpty shouldn't've been there at all.

Humpty Dumpty wasn't very tall,

So Humpty Dumpty of course had a fall.

Humpty Dumpty was smoking some drugs

With a few gangstas and fairy tale thugs

Then all the King's men slapped them in cuffs

All because they had a few too many puffs

Why Humpty Dumpty so impartial about Christmas?

Because he's eggnostic...

Don't let Humpty Dumpty tell a joke

He'll crack himself up

Just tell me mate

Ight guys I wanna make this guy mine and he loves jokes so tell me your best joke .

Well since this is a joke community I will tell a joke so the post won’t get deleted .

Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn?

Because Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.

What was Humpty Dumpty's favorite month?

October... He had a great fall.

What did Humpty Dumpty say to his girlfriend when she said they were breaking up?

Is this some sort of yolk?

Told by a 5 year old boy live on local radio: Why did Mr humpty dumpy push Mrs humpty dumpy off the wall?

.....So he could see her crack....

All the King's Horses, and all the King's Men, couldn't put Humpty together again.

But really, the horses weren't being all that helpful.

What do you call a one-night stand?

Humpty Dumpty.

"I live life on the edge!"

-- Humpty Dumpty

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Some amended Nursery Rhymes

Mary had a little lamb
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her,
between two chunks of bread.

Simple Simon met a Pieman, going to the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the Pieman,
What have you got there?
Said the Pieman unto Simon,
"Pies, you dick...

What do you call it when an egg sleeps with his girlfrind before breaking up with her?

Humpty Dumpty.

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