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Hai Jokes

What did Gimli say to Legolas when the Uruk-hai marched on Helm's Deep?

That's a LOTR orcs!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

One of my drill sergeants favorite stories

A man is driving down the road and his car breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, "My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?"

The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he he...

Sometime in the middle ages, a duke sought to overthrow an earl who was his rival

So he sent a group of his soldiers to sack the earl's castle. As word of the soldiers coming spread through the town outside the castle, most people ran or hid. But as the soldiers passed through the market square, they heard a voice calling "wool for cheap, wool for cheap".

The captain of...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why was the blonde so popular in Japan?

She said hai to everyone.

What's a 3 line poem that overthrows a government?

A Hai-coup

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A businessman travelled to japan

...to attend an important meeting with a local company's CEO. The evening before the meeting, he was anxious and decided to find some distraction by ordering a prostitute to his hotel room. The sex was good and the woman kept yelling "Hai to, hai to, hai tooooo!" until they were finished. He did not...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man was on a business trip to Japan

On his first evening there he met a nice lady, one thing let to another and they ended up in his bed. During sex she kept screaming 'Hai To, Hai To' - the man was flattered, because he thought she was complimenting him.

The next day he was playing golf with his japanese business partners, one...

My asian aunt's quiet daughter

is called Nosai Hai.

I think thats a great shy niece name.

What is a pigeon’s favorite poem?

A hai-coo

Where do Orcs go to school?

Uruk-Hai

Tommy Wiseau was my favorite college professor

He always gave me hai marks

If you overthrow the government in exactly seventeen syllables...

... is it a Hai-coup?

Technically a bilingual pun, hope that's not violating rule 8...

How to speak Chinese

That's not right..................................Sum Ting Wong


Are you harbouring a fugitive?...............Hu Yu Hai Ding?


See me asap......................................Kum Hia Nao


Stupid man........................................Dum Gai


Small horse....

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