Divvy Jokes

A priest, a rabbi and a minister are in a bar…

Talk get around to how they handle their respective donations from the collection plates.

“Well,” says the priest, “to be fair, I draw a chalk circle on the floor, and toss all the money in the air. What falls inside the circle goes to the... read more

Three bulls on the farm. They were just working out divvying up the heifers (young female cows). The biggest claims 60 of the 100 heifers. The second one claims 30 and the smallest, a puny runt gets 10.

Just as they ironed out the details, a huge trailer rolls up and out walks a monster of a ... read more

They had finally picked out all of the pecans, and began to divvy up the harvest. They sat in the branches, hidden from below. "One for you, One for me. One for you, one for me." and so on. While they were counting, they dropped two pecans, and they rolled over to the fence. After a while, a boy had... read more

...all meet up for lunch after service. The priest ask how they divvy up their pay from the collections.

The priest says "I draw a circle, stand in the middle and throw everything up in the air. Whatever lands in the circle god has chosen for me to keep and everything outside goes to charita... read more