This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with big tits?

One is a crusty bus station,
the other is a busty crustacean

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man is in a queue at a store and sees a busty blonde staring at him, he can't believe she is staring at him, then she starts waving.

"Excuse me do I know you?" he asks.

"Yes, I think you are the father of one of my kids" she says.

The man thinks back and remembers his one act of infidelity and says, "Fucking hell, are you the stripper I shagged on my bachelor party, whilst your friend whipped me, and your other frie...

A man walks into a bar. Upon sitting down a busty blond waitress pours him a drink and asks if he would like some food.

He looks up at the menu above the bar. It says Hot Dog $2, Cheeseburger $5, and Handjob $10.

He asks the waitress, "Miss, are you the one who gives the handjobs?"

She winks and replies, "Why yes I am." He says, "Well wash your hands, I want a cheeseburger."

Just made an embarrassing typo

So I urgently needed some data from a senior colleague. And I needed to talk to her to tell her which data I needed. I decided that I would IM(instant messenger) her first to check if she is free and then call her if she said she was.

I pinged her asking 'Hi \_\_\_\_\_\_, are you busy? If not...

A young busty girl was having a physical exam with her doctor.

Doctor: OK now, big breaths.

Patient: Yah, i know, and i'm only thixtheen

One Day, Mario took peach to a fancy pizzaria

They made their order, then sat down and waited. After a few minutes a busty waitress brought them their pizza. Then they started eating. once their meal was done the waitress came back to see how their meal went. To her and Peach's horror, Mario was so big he broke through the roof. When the waitre...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was beaten up by a busty women in an elevator.

I was staring at her boobs when she said “would you please press one?”

So I did.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A biker ...

Walks into a bar and sits down on a bar stool near the end of the bar.
He takes a look at the menu and it reads as follows:

Hamburger – 2.99

Cheeseburger – 3.99

Chicken Sandwich – 4.99

Hand Job – 19.99

The crusty old biker waves the bartender down, and up walks ...

I was at the supermarket, looked three freezers down and saw the most beautiful busty blonde picking out Asian dinners. I took a quick glance at her hand and saw no wedding ring! Well, as you can imagine, I promptly did what any virile, red-blooded man would do with this opportunity...

I got really nervous, said absolutely nothing, and strictly avoided eye-contact at all costs...

What's the difference between a lobster and a Chinese man who's been run over by a bus?

One's a crustacean, the other's a crushed Asian.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man sees an extremely busty woman walking by...

He says, "Hey, will you let me bite those big ol boobies of yours for $1,000?"
Christmas was coming and decided she could use the extra cash, so she agrees.

The two walk around the corner and the woman strips off her shirt and bra, exposing two of the best boobies the guy had ever seen....

The Nudist Club

(Long)

A man joins an extremely exclusive nudist club. The first day in the camp he undresses and starts walking around a bit uncomfortably. The first person he meets is an extremely beautiful busty blonde and the man gets an erection immediately. The woman notices his erection, comes up to h...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man with no arms and no legs is sitting on the beach, thinking deeply about his life.

As he lays there, unable to move, he thinks about all the rejection he has faced. Countless women, scared off by his grotesque appearance, have avoided all contact with him. Never been kissed, never been loved.


As he reflects on his sad, lonely existence, a beautiful, busty young lady, ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Just been on the web site BIGBUSTYCOONS.COM

Those guys really know how to run bus companies!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

One ticket to Boobston

The year is 1993 a young upstart business executive has to take a quick trip to Boston for a board meeting.

Running late he didn't have time to have his administrative assistant call ahead and book his flight, so he decided just to do it himself once he got to the airport.

After being ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There was this small church down in Texas that had a very busty organist.

Her breasts were so huge that they bounced and jiggled while she played the organ. Unfortunately, she distracted the congregation considerably.

The very proper church ladies were appalled. They said something had to be done about this or they would have to get another organist.

So, o...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man and a beautiful busty blonde are sitting on a train...

A man is sitting across from a beautiful busty blonde on a train, who is wearing a tiny mini skirt. To his delight he notices that she has no panties on The beautiful blonde notices him looking at her pussy and asks "Excuse me are you looking at my pussy?"

"Oh I am so sorry I promise not to ...

A middle aged frumpy married couple return to a Mercedes dealership where the salesman has just sold the car they were interested in to a beautiful leggy busty blonde...

"I thought you said you would hold that car till we raised the $75,000 asking price, " said the man, "I just heard you close the deal for $65, 000 to the lovely young lady there. You insisted there could be no discount on the model."

"Well, she had the ready cash, and just look at her, how co...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Freudian slip

A man is sitting in the waiting area of a bus depot when another man sits next to him, shaking his head and gently chuckling. Unable to keep his amusement to himself, he turns to the first man and asks "have you ever had one of those moments where you mean to say one thing but you accidentally say s...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An entire dorm of teenage girls burns down, and tragically, 23 girls were killed in the fire.

Being young, they all go to heaven. In front of the pearly gates, St. Peter has them all line up. The first girl approaches and asks, "What do I have to do to get into heaven?"

"Well," Peter says, "have you ever touched a penis?"

"I did once. But I just poked it!" The girl replies....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A pastor is headed to Pittsburgh

A pastor is headed to Pittsburgh for a convention with his associate preacher and they decide to take the train.

At the station, the pastor tells his associate to have a seat while he purchases their tickets.

After standing in line at the ticket counter for an extended period of time...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I went to the doctors office yesterday

Only to find out that my new doctor is a hot, busty blonde. Drop dead gorgeous.

Taken back, I'm a little embarrassed...

She said, "don't worry, I'm a professional and I've seen it all. So whatever your problem is, I'll check it out."

I said, "My wife thinks my dick tastes funny....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between Korean women with large breasts and lobsters?

One group is Busty asians and the other is Crustaceans.

Three friends go on a skiing trip.

Three friends go on a skiing trip, but they need to save money so they rent a cabin with only one bed that’s big enough for all three of them.

After the first night the guy on the left says he had the most amazing dream. A busty blonde seduced him and gave him an amazing handjob.

The...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A husband and wife are eating at Hooters for their 20th anniversary.

A busty gorgeous blond waitress comes up and asks them what they'd like to drink.
"Oh my god you are gorgeous." Said the husband with the intent of pissing his wife off.
His wife just shook her head and smiled.
"Why don't you introduce your wife to her you pig, or better yet, introduce her...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man with a black eye takes his seat on the plane, when he notices that the man next to him also has a black eye....

"How did you get yours?" He asked

"A Freudian slip at the ticket gate," he replies "the girl selling the tickets was beautiful busty blonde. When I meant to ask for a ticket to Pittsburg, I accidentally asked for a picket to Tits-burg and she clocked be right in the eye. How about you? How'd ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A lich walks into a tavern

The whole place fell silent. The customers have heard tales of their existence, but most have never seen a lich before. The lich plops himself down at the bar counter, a few seats away from a human warrior and his busty mage companion. They exchanged looks.

"Whoa," the mage whispered. "It's a...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was in the elevator staring at a busy woman's breasts.

When she suddenly looked at me and told me "Could you please press one?" So I did and that's the last thing I remember.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Rednecks and the elevator.

A redneck family are visiting a big city for the first time.

The father ans son are in the hotel lobby when the spot an elevator.

"What's that Paw?" The boy asked.

"I ain't never did see nothin' like that in my life" Replied the father.

Seconds later an old frail woman wa...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Should, shouldn't and misspeaking: Two blokes having a drink..

Bob: "I had a freudian slip the other day."
Norm: Wtf is a freudian slip?
Bob: It's when you mean to say one thing, but your subconcious turns it into something else. For example, I was at a party the other night and a lovely busty young lady was carrying around a bowl of chips offering th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The old farmer and his dear friend went to the market.

The market was full of various stalls stocked with agricultural goods & wares. Whilst browsing the plentiful market the old farmer couldn’t help but notice a busty blonde lady and he stared at her longingly.

“Corrr!” Whispered the old farmer to his pal. “I’ll pay a pretty penny to get me...

Bench Bros...

Two guys are in the gym working on their bench pressing when a busty coed comes up to the rack next to them and begins to do her workout. One guy turns to his spotter and says "hey you think that's a push up bra?" And his spotter says "nah brah, that's a squat"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old man is spending his first day inside a nursing home.

He wakes up with a rock hard erection and immediately a beautiful busty blonde nurse walks in, gives him a sponge bath and sucks him off. When she leaves he calls his son and tells him he loves it, this is the greatest place ever and that he's going to get some breakfast. As he's walking out the doo...

Good joke to drop on most people.

A man walks into a bar and see's a sign that says:
Hamburgers - $1.00
Cheeseburgers - $2.00
Handjobs - $10.00

So the man approaches the blond, busty, beautiful bartender and says: "Are you the one who gives the handjobs?"

She replies "I sure am, sugar!"

"Great. Wash you...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.