I really wish some of the fantasies in 50 shades of grey were real...

like how she got a job right out of college.

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Watched 50 Shades of Grey with my parents and Christ if all the sex didn't make the whole thing awkward.

I could barely see the screen with my mom bent over like that.

My wife said she wanted to see 50 Shades of Grey.

So I took a photo of her hair!

Being quite new in prison, I told my inmates the "50 shades of grey" joke today.

Turned out not to be a problem, as everyone seemed to be used to long sentences.

50 shades of grey

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50 shades of grey is a genius title but had they thought about it

They should have added 19 more shades

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Where did E. L. James learn to write “50 Shades of Grey”?

AP Cliterature

I accidentally walked into my daughter’s room and was shocked to see her reenacting a fantasy scene from 50 Shades of Grey.

Like the one where she gets a decent job right out of college.

In my girlfriend's copy of 50 Shades of Grey I found a photo of me with the word "scumbag" written as a caption.

I guess I'm not in her good books.

50 shades of grey would be a perfect title for a movie about a dog reading a map of the US.

EDIT: Thanks a million to everyone who upvoted. It's the first time I get these many. Oh, and by the way, the joke is stolen, it's a meme that has been going around for a while now, so... middle finger to all of you.

This week Lego Batman sold more tickets than the sequel to 50 Shades of Grey...

When asked to comment about this 50 Shades stated "It's okay, I like to be dominated."

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I was talking to my buddy about 50 Shades Of Grey

He said "yeah, my wife and I have been doing S&M for years."
"Really!", I said, "I had no idea!"
"Sure," he said, "she sleeps and I masturbate!"

I went to the 50 Shades of Grey midnight premier earlier tonight

Just sucks I couldn't hear the movie over all those goddamn bees in the theater

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Why do women find the guy in 50 Shades of Grey sexy?

beats me

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So, my girlfriend wanted to try some stuff she saw in the new 50 Shades of Grey movie

Girlfriend: I just saw the new 50 shades and I really wanna try something I saw in the move.

Me: oh yeahhhh? What’d you wanna try babe?

Girlfriend: Fuck a billionaire.

50 shades of grey

Girl 1: Hey have you read 50 shades of grey yet?
Girl 2: Yes! From cover to cover!
Girl 1: And the index?
Girl 2: Exhausted...

50 shades of grey broke a lot of box office records for R-rated movies…

Well first it tied them, then it beat them.

What do you get if you cross 50 Shades of Grey with Blurred Lines?

A greydient

Four guys have been going on the same golfing trip to St Andrews for many years.. Two days before the group is to leave, John's wife puts her foot down and tells him he isn't going. John's mates are very upset that he can't go, but what can they do.

Two days later, the three get to St Andrews only to find John sitting at the bar with four drinks set up! "Wow, John, how long you been here, and how did you talk your Missus into letting you go?" "Well, I've been here since last night... Yesterday evening, I was sitting in my living room chair and ...

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Did you hear about the medical student who wrote a porn novel?

It's called 50 Shades of Grey's Anatomy.

The fishing trip

So four high school friends have gone fishing together every year for the last two decades. That was until this year, when Jim had to inform the group he couldn't make it.

"Look, it's the wife. She's been saying I haven't been spending enough time with her."

Of course, the others were...

I was gunna write the great American nursing home romance novel...

....but the title "50 Shades of Grey" was already taken.

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What is Trump's favorite book?

50 Shades of Grey: the story of a billionaire dominating and fucking a dumb American.

Do you want to satisfy your hardcore food fetish?

Buy my new book: 50 Shades of Grey Poupon

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