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You Laugh Jokes

A guy walks into a Starbucks and says to the barista “If I make you laugh, I get free coffee.”

The barista, feeling generous, says “Sure, if you make me laugh, your coffee’s on me!”

The guy says “Ok, this one’s hilarious: What did Timmy want for his birthday?”

The barista says “I don’t know, what did he want?”

“Parents.”

There was dead silence from the barista.
...

Can a joke about dinosaurs make you laugh?

You bet jurassic can

You hear a cancer joke and it makes you laugh...

... until you get it.

I asked my GF, "Why do abortion jokes made you laugh so much?"

She said, "because they bring out the kid in me."

Five secrets to Men’s happiness: 1. Find a woman who can make you laugh 2. Find a woman who can cook 3. Find a woman who really listens to you 4. Find a woman who is amazing in bed, and

5 Make sure these four women do not find out about each other

Can a Mongolian make you laugh?

Genghis Kahn.

(No idea if this is an old joke or not. I told it in a dream I had last night so I'm claiming as original).

Why do you applaud when you laugh?

Because if you're happy and you know it, clap your hands!

A funny story written by some of my Chinese students, 10/11 years old. i hope it makes you laugh

The Foolish Farmer


 
A long time ago, there was a farmer who had never been to the city before. One day, he went to the supermarket in the city. He saw a rubber that was like a small car. He asked the seller, “Why is this car so small?”
 


The seller replied, “ Its not a c...

Teacher: Why are you laughing alone? Tell the Joke to the class so everyone can laugh.

Student : Sir, he said that you're a good teacher.

How does a snowman make you laugh?

It gives you an icetickle

What happens if you laugh at a joke that doesn't have gold?

You lgh at it.

Every eleventh pun can make you laugh

Because no pun in ten did.

Did this make you laugh?

A man takes his Bulldog to the vet and says “My dog is cross-eyed. Is there anything you can do for him?” The vet thinks for a few seconds and says, “Well, let’s have a look at him.” The vet picks the dog up while examining his eyes. At long last, he says, “I’m going to have to put him down.” “Wh...

It’s the little things that make you laugh...

According to my wife.

This is apparently the world's funniest joke. Would you laugh at it?

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he'...

What drink makes you laugh uncontrollably?

Alcoh-lol.

OK, time to go.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Translated this joke from my native language...

A guy say (Billy) who had very small penis, came to know about a guy. who knew a word, which upon saying penis grows by some inches.



Billy went there, that guy sat on a hill, and to climb that hill, there was a rope. So Billy started climbing that hill, upon climbing, the man asked B...

What do you call candy that makes you laugh?

LOLlies

How do you laugh in North Korean?

You dont

Robber: Give me all your money! Me: *starts laughing* Robber: why are you laughing?

Me: I have a negative bank account balance.

The lion decided to invite everyone to his birthday party. But, him being the king, he ordered everybody to bring him meat as a present, or else he will hit them with his massive dong. And soon, the day came and all the animals lined up infront of the lion's cave with their presents.

The Wolf wanted to gift the King lamb, the fox had a chicken, the leopard an antilope, and so on...The lion greeted all of his guests and welcomed them to the party. Suddenly, the rabbit stood infront of him with a carrot. All guests went silent. The lion looked him in the eyes and said: " You know...

This is for Robin Williams

A man goes to see a doctor. Doctor asks what seems to be the trouble. The man says, "Doc, I'm depressed. Simply, I can't sleep sometimes, I can't eat, I feel down and irritable most days. I just can't feel 'happy.'"

The Doctor says, "I've got the perfect fix for you. In town tonight is the g...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why wouldn't you laugh at punch lines in a circle-jerk?

You'd see them coming.

Jimmy farts in the classroom and his teacher gets really upset and throws him out.

He sits outside the class and can’t stop laughing. The principle walks by and sees him. He asks, “Jimmy, why are you sitting outside your class laughing?"

“I farted in class and the teacher threw me out.” The principle asks him again, “Well then, why are you laughing?”

“Because those i...

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