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Twinkie Jokes

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Twinkie

A little girl goes to the barber shop with her father. She stands right next to the barbers chair, while her father is getting his haircut, eating her snake cake.

The barber says to her, "Sweetheart, you are going to get hair on your twinkie".

She says, "I know, I am going to get bo...

How do you get a Twinkie pregnant?

Put it in a box of Ding Dongs.

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This is a joke my dad told me. He said he originally heard it from his father, who heard it from his father before him.

A man goes to the doctor and says

"Doc, I think I have a tapeworm"

The doctor looks at him and says

"Well, we're all out of medicine for that, but there might be something else I can do for you. Come home, then come back tomorrow with an orange, a Twinkie, and a baseball bat"...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A little girl walks into a hair salon eating a twinkie

The stylist thinks nothing of it and begins to cut her hair. The cut hair falls and lands on her twinkie, so the stylist says "hey, your getting hair on your twinkie." The little girl smiles and jumps up and says "Yea, and im getting tits too!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This is an old one. RIP Pillsbury Doughboy

It is with the saddest heart that I must pass on the following news:

Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community.

The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes in the belly.

He was...

Why is everyone so mad at me? I was told to bring a “Hostess” gift to the party…

…I brought a DOZEN Twinkies.

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What do you call...

What do you call 10 naked guys standing on eachothers shoulders?? A scrotum pole!

What do you call a school bus full of a bunch of naked white guys?? A twinkie!

Your welcome. Lolol

How do you get a Michigan girl into an elevator?

Grease her hips, and throw in a Twinkie.

What do you call a school bus full of white people?

A Twinkie

I asked a grocery store worker where I could find cakes, pastries and Twinkies and the like and he took me over to the right place, telling me this is the proper spot but then left me before I could find what I was looking for and I couldn't leave until I found it.

So, yes, I was stranded on a desserted aisle.

My girlfriend stopped being my toaster strudel today...

Now that she's on birth control, she became my twinkie!

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Yo mama jokes

Yo mama so stupid that when saw a bus full of white kids she said "Stop that twinkie!!".

Yo mama so dumb that she went to the dentist to get a bluetooth.

Yo mama so stupid that when she heard that there was a serial killer on the loose, she hid all of her cherios.

Yo mama so fat...

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A little girl goes with her dad to the barber...

... and instead of sitting in the waiting area, she sits in the floor beside the barber chair where her daddy's getting his hair cut.

She has a small purse, and while waiting she pulls out a small snack cake and unwraps it.

The barber says to her, "Little girl, you're gonna get hair a...

Your momma's so fat....

She saw a yellow bus full of white kids and screamed "FOLLOW THAT TWINKIE!!!"




god i miss middle school

Guy named Ross gets a new job as a school bus driver...

He gets a bus that has Bert and Ernie, Grover, Big Bird, et. al. painted on it. He says "Are you kidding me?". Boss replies, "Once you have some seniority we'll give you a newer bus."

So, he sets out on the run and at his first stop a boy gets on. Ross says, "Hi. I'm your new bus driver, ...

A college fellow is trying to find a date to take to the county fair - and maybe a little more afterwards.

After some fruitless searching, a buddy of his says "I know this cute girl, Ruby, that you ought to meet!" So he arranges for them to meet and go to the county fair together.

Well, they get there, he shows Ruby around and asks her "What do you want to do?"

"I wanna get weighed!" says ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A jew and an American are on a train together. (Sorry for a possibly incorrect or missing flair, I can't flair for some reason)

The American has lots of food. Burgers as the main course, coca cola as the drink, and Twinkies for dessert. The jew has very little food, just some dried fish.



The jew tells the American: "You should give me your burgers and other food in exchange for my fish. It contains phosphorus ...

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