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"The holocaust wasn't that bad"

"The holocaust wasn't *that* bad"
"Of course it was!"
"I'll prove it. I'll kill 6 million jews and one horse"
"Why the horse?"
"See? Nobody cares about the jews!"

What's the difference between the Holocaust and the Boston Marathon Bombing?

The Boston Marathon Bombing ended a race.

Germany is a pretty weird country. If you deny the Holocaust, you go to jail.

But if you organize one, you are promoted to Reich Chancellor.

When you see pictures of the Holocaust it’s really sad

But it’s even more depressing when you realize the camera adds 10 pounds

I would appreciate it if we stopped posting Holocaust Jokes. They're not funny, witty, or humorous. My Grandpa died in the Holocaust

He fell off the Guard Tower

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I was disgusted when my buddy told me he had masturbated to the Holocaust movie, Schindler’s List, so I asked him how in the hell he could possibly have felt okay doing that.

He looked at me curiously and said, “What do you mean? There was that one shower scene.”

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Two jews that died during the holocaust get to heaven.

One of them says to the other “remember how they strip us down in the snow and made us wait there for 5 hours?”

The other laughs “yeah! Remember how they took your twin kids and preformed lethal surgery on them?”

The first guy laughs again “yeah!”

The two keep laughing as God ap...

What's the difference between the holocaust and the excess fat under a woman's upper arms?

You can make a joke about the holocaust.

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[Offensive] What do you get when you cross a bowl of fruit and the holocaust?

Orange Jews from concentrate

What's the similarity between the moon landings and the holocaust?

They both use a lot of gas to send people far away

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Did you hear about the Holocaust?

The Jews did Nazi that one coming.

My grandpa let 200 people go from a concentration camp in the holocaust

He was the worst security guard ever

What's the difference between the Holocaust and a cow?

You can't milk a cow for 75 years

The class is learning about the holocaust, when the teacher asks if anyone's grandparents died in the deathcamps. Little Billy puts his hand up.

"Oh... Class, let us hold a minute of silence for him. If it is not too indiscreet, how did he die?"

"Fell off a watchtower."

A Jewish Man, Killed in the Holocaust, Rises to Heaven. Once there, he Tells God a Holocaust Joke.

God contemplates the joke briefly before echoing out in a thunderous voice:

“THAT’S NOT FUNNY!”

The man simply shrugs:

“I guess you had to be there.”

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Two Jews die in the holocaust and go to heaven.

Jew 1: *laughing* Remember when they made us stay outside and caused our toes to freeze and fall off?

Jew 2: *laughing his lungs out* oh yes! And remember how the gave us “coffee” that turned out to be coal mixed with oil?


The two laugh and laugh and God approaches


God: ...

A Holocaust survivor goes to heaven. He finds himself standing in front of God. Being a funny guy, he cracks a joke about the Holocaust.

God: "That's not funny."

Survivor:. "Huh. Guess you had to be there"

[Tasteless] Lost my great uncle in the Holocaust

Dumbass fell off the guard tower.

What is "Worse then the Holocaust"?

Poor Grammar

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What does having sex with me and the holocaust have in common?

There are people who still deny it ever happened.

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A woman went to a synagogue in Poland after the Holocaust to record the history that was nearly lost forever, where she found an unusual tradition she had never seen before.

At the synagogue, when they carried the Torah\*, they would bring it around to everyone who wanted to touch the Torah, which was normal. But when they brought the Torah down the center aisle, the carrier would get down on their knees and knee-walk all the way!

The woman had never heard of thi...

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My Grandfather died in the concentration camps during the holocaust....

....poor bastard fell out of his gun tower.

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Why did the Jews in Germany not establish an organization against the Holocaust?

There was too little interest.

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Whats worse than The Holocaust?

6 million jews.......

Did you hear about the Jewish couple that met during the Holocaust?

They were star-crossed lovers.

Whats funnier than Amy Schumer?

The Holocaust

People act surprised when I tell them my grandfather survived the holocaust.

Most of the guards survived didn't they?

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What's the sexiest thing about the holocaust

The shower scenes

My biology teacher said there is no evolutionary advantage to blue eyes.

She must have never heard of the holocaust.

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Hitler may be responsible for the holocaust

but EA is responsible for the hall of cost

I'm getting really sick of all the Holocaust jokes...

My great grandfather died at Auschwitz, so I find these jokes really offensive. Granted, he fell out of a guard tower and broke his neck, but I think that still counts.

Everyone keeps telling me that the holocaust happened..

But I don't know if it Israel.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

The holocaust

Whats worse than one bee sting?

Two bee stings


Whats worse than two bee stings?


The holocaust


Whats worse than the holocaust?




Three bee stings

A holocaust survivor goes to heaven...

A holocaust survivor dies and goes to heaven and upon entry through the Pearly Gates, meets God and says, "hey, do you want to hear a Holocaust joke?"

To which God replies, "I guess, go ahead."

After the joke God responds, "that was not funny."

The Holocaust survivor answers in ...

Just because a lot of work went into it, doesn’t make it good.

Just look at the holocaust.

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I am thinking of opening a world war 2 themed amusement park

I just think that the holocauster will be a huge hit

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I'd say Hitler was too dramatic.

I mean, the Holocaust was pretty overkill.

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Hitler was a hero...

He single handedly ended the Holocaust, and killed one of the most evil people from history!

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An old Jewish man dies and goes to haven

An angel informs him that all those who lived a long and virtuous life and still believe in the creator get an audience with the Heavenly Father himself. The man proudly says “I do” and he gets to meet God for 5 minutes.

He does not want to God to hear the same tired questions that he is sur...

So I heard Microsoft pulled the plug after their chat robot slung slurs, ripped Obama and denied the Holocaust...

I guess there wasn't enough room for two Trumps in the Republican party.

My dad is German and dropped this one on me the other day.

Dad: I never told you this but, my great grandfather died in the holocaust.

Me: Oh, man thats terrible.

Dad: Yeah, he got really drunk one night and fell off of the guard tower.

My dad's Christian and my mom's jewish and they LOVE recycling...

But it's a little awkward for both me and my grandad on ash wednesday. Sadly he didn't survive the holocaust.

Reflections on the Jonestown massacre of 1978

As a society, we sometimes tell jokes about some of the most horrific events--mass murders, disasters, and so on. Often the jokes start within a day or two of the catastrophe, even before the dead can be counted. Perhaps we do it as a coping or healing mechanism, or perhaps it's our only extant type...

A blonde is proposed by her fiancee.

"Sara, will you marry me?"
"Yes, I will!"
"This ring is from my grandmother. She survived the holocaust with this."
"I didn't know they gave rings out to people during the holocaust"

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Rabbi Dies and Goes to Heaven

An old Rabbi dies and goes to heaven.

God meets him at the pearly gates, and says,

“Schlomo - you’ve been a good Jew. Your ticket to heaven will be easy. All you need to do is tell me a joke.”

Schlomo thinks this is such a great opportunity. So, he tells God a long, drawn out ...

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As a man of Jewish descent

As a man of Jewish descent I don't like jokes about us Jews.
I think they often cement prejudices and misinterpretations of the Jewish people and culture.
But every now and then even I enjoy a good laugh and feel that I shouldn't be so serious about everything.

So I have a very good ...

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Hitlers suicide

A man is sitting next to his jewish wife and decided to tell a joke:

Man: why did Hitler kill himself?

Woman: I don't know. Why did he?

Man: He saw the gas bill!

Woman: agh that is so insensitive.

Man: I know...My grand father died in the Holocaust.

Woman: a...

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