[Religion] [Racist]What is the difference between christianity and national socialism?

In christianity, one guy died for all the others.

if I had a dollar for everytime socialism was succesful, I'd have 0$

Which is funny because if it did work, I'd also have 0$

Real socialism, waiting on a breadline.

Joke socialism, waiting on a punchline.

Socialism is good for only one thing.

Weight loss.

I finally understand the difference between capitalism, libertarianism, and socialism.

Capitalists hire libertarians to say socialism is bad. Socialists say capitalism is bad for free. And libertarians will say everyone else is bad as long as they get paid.

Socialism works great!

Until you run out of other people's money

Why are so many young people turning to socialism and communism?

Because then they can seize the memes of production.

What's the difference between Capitalism & Socialism?

With Capitalism, man exploits man.

And it's the opposite with Socialism.

This is Armenian Radio; our listeners asked us: “Is it possible to build socialism in Sahara desert?”

We are answering: “Possible, but you will end up with a shortage of sand.”

It's impossible to make a joke about Socialism.

Because its not funny unless EVERYBODY gets it.

Converting pimps to socialism is proving difficult

Maybe I shouldn't have told them they have nothing to lose but their chains

Capitalism, Communism, and Socialism have a meeting for afternoon tea

Communism collapses on the way there and dies from malnutrition. Socialism is so late from collecting welfare to buy the tea that he decides to go home. However, Capitalism - seeing that neither of the two showed up - buys his own tea, finishes his lunch break, and goes back to work.

Socialism is like breathing water...

You just aren't doing it right! Here let me try...

A man rubs a magic lamp and a Genie pops out.

Genie: You have one wish, but there's three rules. I can't kill anyone, I can't make people fall in love and can't bring anyone back from the dead.

Man: I want socialism to work.

Genie: There's four rules.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two Cows

**Edit: Just to make it clear, I am not taking credit for the joke(s). I just merely found it/them whilst browsing around and thought you guys would appreciate it/them.**



SOCIALISM

You have 2 cows.

You give one to your neighbour



COMMUNISM

You have 2...

Politics in terms of cows

SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The state takes a high portion of the milk they produce to be redistributed.

COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The State takes both of them and you have to get into a bread line for food instead.

FASCISM: You have two cows. The State will kill you if you don't...

Capitalism is dancing at the edge of the abyss.

Socialism, of course, is one step ahead of them.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Some historic anti-Nazi jokes from Germany

Hey there. I thought, I'll take the time and translate you some of the so-called "Flüsterwitze"(whisper jokes) from nazi Germany.

* The old code of law seems to complicated, so it has to be changed. From now on, there are only three laws: 1. If you do something, or fail to do something, you ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Saw someone post this on Facebook. Got a kick out of it.

This morning I was awoken by my alarm clock powered by electricity
generated by the public power monopoly regulated by the U.S. Department of Energy.

I then took a shower in the clean water provided by a municipal water
utility.

After that, I turned on the TV to one of the FCC-re...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I don't support Trump, but I would never denigrate his supporters

If you're a Trump supporter, "denigrate" means "to put down."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

New US dollar announced today...

They've decided to change the motto. After much pressure from atheist groups, they're removing 'In God We Trust' and going back to Latin. However, 'E Pluribus Unum' sounds too foreign and reeks of socialism, so they're going with a more simple and straightforward 'Carpe Vulva'.

The runner up ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If you have two cows,

Socialism: The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor

Communism: You give them to the government and the government gives you some milk

Fascism: You keep the cows and give the milk to the government, then the government sells you some milk

New Dealism: You shoot one ...

Since we are doing time period jokes: A Joke from the Great Depression.

Government: you have two cows

Socialism: You keep one cow's milk and the government takes the other and gives out its milk.

Communism: The government takes both cows and gives its milk away as it sees fit.

New Dealism: You get rid of both your cows and milk the government.

A Communist dies...

...at home with his family. He was a good man in life, caring for his family and working hard for the good of Socialism and his fellow man. However, being a Communist and therefore an Atheist, he is not allowed entrance into Heaven, and being such a good man, he cannot be consigned to Hell forever, ...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.