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Rewatch Jokes

Elon Musk rewatches The Matrix.

Realizes that Neo is the good guy.

After rewatching Doctor Strange use the Eye of Agamotto

I thought that it would be a good idea to list other lesser known, possibly not as powerful, Eye Relics for those who may not know of their existence.

The Eye of Hellomoto: Helps improve Motorola phone reception.

The Eye of Pickamoco: Aids in clearing the nasal cavity of any sorcerer...

What is your favorite Norm Macdonald joke/lune

"You,re the first defensive player ever to win the Heisman trophy, and no one can take that away from you."


"....Unless, of course, you kill your wife and a waiter"

If you see your joke, by all means comment, but don't repeat it, find another -he has thousands and thousands - I ...

So I was rewatching old seasons of spongebob and found this joke

Spongebob: *changes his shape to look like Texas*

Also Spongebob: “hey Patrick what do I look like”

Patrick: “stupid”

Spongebob: “no I’m Texas”

Patrick: “what’s the difference”

*both laugh*
(I thought this might be relevant considering the mess in Texas right no...

Heard this in deadpool while I was rewatching it

Doctor says to his patient
"you don't have that long to live" the patient the patient says
"how long do I have?"
Doctor says
"5"
Patient says
"5 what?"
Doctor says
"4, 3, 2, 1"

Tom Hardy goes to a movie theater

Tom Hardy goes to a movie theater to rewatch his movie - the Dark Knight Rises. To avoid being recognized on the street, he rushes into the theater, forgetting to wear his mask. Before he gets far, one of the theater employees stops him. Tom thinks it’s one of his fans asking for an autograph but to...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Coronavirus Pandemic, day 16

If anyone is still out there, I’m alive but struggling. Food is running low. Down to only 459 days worth. My hands are super sanitized and my butt is super clean. Down to 1599 rounds of ammo (dropped 1 round down the heat vent while doing daily inventory). Power still on, but for how long? Missing h...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Moses and Jesus are playing golf.

Moses steps up to the tee and hits a beautiful shot 250 yards straight down the middle of the fairway.

Jesus steps up to the tee and hooks the ball into the trees.

Jesus looks up into the heavens, raises his arms, and suddenly the sky darkens. A thunder clap rings out, rain pours dow...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

One day a new stage play was released that was supposed to be the #1 comedy of the year.

Unfortunately from the get go it had poor reviews frequently stating that it just wasn't that funny. The writer of the script was at a loss and was getting ready to cancel the show when his friend called.

He told him he had just watched the show and true to the reviews it was pretty terrible...

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