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Prospector Jokes

Why did the non-binary prospector move West in 1849?

Because there was gold up in them/their hills.

Did you hear the one about the non binary gold prospector

They dug a fortune out of them/their hills.

An Oil Prospector Died and went to Heaven

And St. Peter said, "Well, I checked you out, and you meet all of the qualifications. But there’s one problem."

"We have some tough zoning laws up here, and we keep all of the oil prospectors over in that pen. And as you can see, it is absolutely chock-full. There is no room for you.’"
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An old prospector shuffled into the town of El Indio, Texas leading a tired old mule.

The old man headed straight for the only saloon in town, to clear his parched throat.

He walked up to the saloon and tied his old mule to the hitch rail.

As he stood there, brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in...

After years of digging, a gold prospector finally found a small amount of a precious metal

It was a miner success.

An oil prospector is waiting at the gates of heaven.

St. Peter had some bad news for an oil prospector who appeared at the pearly gates of heaven: “You’re qualified for admission,” said St. Peter, “but, as you can see, the section for oil prospectors is packed. There’s no way to fit you in.”

After a moment, the prospector asked to say just four...

Did you hear about the old prospector who accidentally swallowed a gold nugget?

I saw him digging through is feces, so I asked him what he was doing. He said he was just mining his own business.

What did the gold prospector say when he saw bits of silver in his pan?

weird flecks, but okay.

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A prospector has been in the mountains for years.

I stole this from an HBO comedy special and posted it elsewhere.

A prospector spent 5 years in the mountains looking for gold. One day he comes to town and heads to the bar. He says "bartender, gimme a whiskey". He has his drink and says "bartender, you got any women around here?". Bartender ...

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A prospector finds gold...

A prospector is mining for gold in Alaska when he finally manages to find a large portion of gold nuggets. Overcome with happiness he decides to celebrate. He goes off into town and into an inn where he asks for the roughest, toughest, meanest prostitute they have. The bartender tells him to go room...

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What is the difference between a prospector and a paedophile?

Prospectors mine for treasure, but paedophiles treasure minor's.

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An old prospector finds a gold nugget...

Excited to have a little cash and looking to celebrate, he gets on his donkey and rides it down into town. He walks into the saloon, has some whisky, and then says, "Bartender, you got any women around here?" The bartender says, "Nope. But we got old Fred in the back." The prospector looks disgusted...

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The world fossil fuel industry was shocked by the scandalous public exposure of LITERAL underground "swingers parties". The scandal allegedly involves numerous lustful Coal Union members including prospectors, colliers, dredgers, excavators, and sappers...

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# POST REMOVED

# Rule 9 - Reddit prohibits any sexual or suggestive content involving minors.

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An old time prospector lives 50 miles outside of the only town for a hundred miles

This old timer is well known for only coming in to town once a year, to spend his money on whiskey and supplies, never to be seen again until the next year.

One year, he comes to town, heads straight for the bar, and tells the bartender "set 'em up, I'm celebratin'!"

After he knocks b...

the greenhorn

A greenhorn comes from back east to try his hand at prospecting. He buys his gear and heads off into the hills. He has a couple of lonely weeks, with a little bit of success finding gold.

He's sitting by his campfire one evening when this crusty old prospector shows up and says "Howdy there...

What did the prospector say the the zombie rappers?

"There's mold in them there grills"

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Gus the Accountant

Gus has been doing accountancy for like 35 years and he's sick of it.

So Gus decides he wants some adventure in his life, so he's going to become a prospector.

Everyday he studies geology, he learns how to drive a big truck and operate an excavator and he starts selling up everything h...

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So a father decides to give his so $1 to get laid...

So the old farmer decided his son was of age. The brothel in town had a tradition that a young man could have his first evening with a lady for only $1. So the farmer gives his boy $1 and sends him to town.

Well the boy makes it to the brothel. He gets welcomed by a talented older lady, pays ...

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A prospector is out in the Yukon for months when he finally goes back to town to sell his gold that he has found.

With a fistful of cash, he goes to the brothel, but he's late in getting there and all the pretty, younger girls are taken. The madam tells him she has a real treat for him for only $20 in the last room on the left upstairs. He pays the $20 and goes to the room.

He opens the door and there's ...

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Told to me 40 years ago, by a 15 YO young lady.

Prospector comes into town. It's been 20 years since he's seen a woman. "Barkeep! gimme a whiskey!" He knocks it back and says, "Barkeep! whadda ya do fer wimmen in this town?"

"Well," the bartender replies,"we got Ole' Joe 'round back ... "

"Whoooooa! I don't go in fer that kinda ...

Staking a claim

In 1897 a young man set out for adventure from the frontier city of Seattle. He'd risked his entire life savings to make the trek to the Yukon to prospect for gold.

He started his journey full of excitement and hope. he'd purchased his 2,000lbs of gear and supplies and two fine stock horses t...

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