UPJOKE
reeva steenkampfibulapretoriahouse arrestthokozile masipat44sprintamputationparalympiciaafmurderafrikanerafrikaanswrestlingmanagement

Oscar Pistorius Jokes

Let's play the Oscar Pistorius drinking game

Whenever your girlfriend goes to the bathroom take a shot

Oscar Pistorius really wanted a new bathroom door

but his girlfriend was dead against it.

Oscar Pistorius

Surely Oscar Pistorius isn't the only guy who's come home legless, and then shot a load into his girlfriend's face while imaging it was someone else?

Olympic bilateral amputee Oscar Pistorius lost his appeal for the crime of murder. The Judge said...

He didn't have a leg to stand on.

If Oscar Pistorius’s lower legs hadn’t been amputated

he would have been an un-de-feeted champion

How are Manchester City and Oscar Pistorius similar?

They lost both legs, but still managed to get four shots on target.

Bad taste

"If you'd had a tin of shoe polish, you could have blackened her up and got away with it," I said to Oscar Pistorius, laughing.

Then I realised that was in bad taste. Why would he have a tin of shoe polish?

Why did Oscar Pistorius leave the courtroom?

He had to bounce.

Do you know what made Oscar Pistorius so angry at his girlfriend?

She was looking at another man's legs.

Did you hear about Oscar Pistorius' home improvements?

He wants a new bathroom door, but his girlfriend's dead against it

Oscar Pistorius is pleading not guilty to the charge of premeditated murder

Frankly I don't think he's got a leg to stand on.

Despite Oscar Pistorius' terrible actions, you HAVE to cut him some slack.

Come on, he's never had a leg to stand on

What's the difference between England and Oscar Pistorius?

England gets off scott-free.

"Bloodied cricket bat found in Oscar Pistorius' house"

In addition, locals have told police that he was previously sighted with stumps.

Are we sure that Oscar Pistorius was the only one involved in the murder of his girlfriend?

Someone else may well have done the leg work.

OJ Simpson, Scott Peterson, and Oscar Pistorius walk into a bar...

...all three order a Bloody Mary.

Knock Knock

"Who's There?"

"Bang Bang"

"Bang Bang Who?"

"Oscar Pistorius"

Roses are red...

Violets are glorious.

I wouldn't surprise

Oscar Pistorius.

Oscar

• Roses are red,

Violets are glorious,

Don't try to surprise

Oscar Pistorius


• She didn't notice Oscar sneaking up behind her. It was the silence of the limbs.

• Oscar Pistorius. Not the first South African with a race problem.

• When Oscar Pistorius sai...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.