UPJOKE
cowardsliveriedhenpeckedfrilledmanedspinedstockingedpodgesouledfroidsheenypuceduperishsloe

Livered Jokes

John was the best liver surgeon in his hospital.

I guess you could say he always de-livered.

Frank was in dire need of a liver...

So his friend Fred delivered.

UPS- Your package has been delivered

Me- Ok, thanks, but why was it livered in the first place?

I saw that a fellow Redditor needed a liver.

Lets just say

(•_•) / ( •_•)>⌐□-□ / (⌐□_□)

OP De-livered


 

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^Not ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^a ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^true ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^story

I bought some pets online, and just had them delivered.

Turns out they need their liver.

What do you call an alcoholic mailman?

De-livered

Babies shouldn't be delivered.

Livers are important.

I wanted to order food from a fancy restaurant

I didn't want to leave the house, though, so I had them bring the food to me.

I ordered a medium rare steak and foie gras, but when the food arrived my foie gras was missing!

Furious, I drove over to the restaurant and demanded they give me my full order. They did, and before I left I ...

When asked to provide proof that he had cirrhosis, what did OP do?

OP de-livered.

These days, people are always having their food delivered.

Why don't they just order it without the livers?

My attempt at a Mitch Hedberg joke

"Why are people always having their pizzas delivered? Just order them without liver."

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.