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Listen To Them Jokes

Wives always complain that their husbands don't listen to them.

My wife has never complained about this. Or maybe she has. I don't know.

My friends say that I don't listen to them.

Or something like that.

Hearing aid

Having lost most of his hearing a number of years ago, this elderly man goes to the doctor to be fitted with hearing aids which promise to allow him to hear 100%.

A month later, he returns to the doctor for a check up on his progress. The doctor tells him that his hearing is perfect and asks...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Apple announced a breast implant that plays music...

The iTit is considered a major social break through since women have always complained that men stare at their breasts but never listen to them.

Spouses are like mosquitoes

We don’t really mind them if we don’t have to listen to them.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Russian Joke: A little girl goes up to her mother...

...and asks her,

"Mommy, why does everyone say my face looks like an ass?"

Her mother replies,

"Oh honey no, you're beautiful! Don't listen to them, just go talk to your father."

So the little girl finds her father and asks him,

"Papa, why does everyone say that ...

people told me i will never be successful because of my deafness

but i never listen to them

Always be true to yourself! Never listen to those who tell you what you can't do! They told Beethoven he'd never make music because he was deaf...

But he didn't listen to them...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A menstrual pad goes to school where she got bullied by two tampons

The toilet roll walked up to her and told the menstrual pad “Don’t listen to them, They’re both stuck up cunts”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A ventriloquist goes to stay on a farm....

A ventriloquist goes to stay on a farm and is receiving a tour from the farmer,as they approach the first field full of horses the ventriloquist decides to have some fun with the farmer.
He walks upto a horse and says "so hows things on the farm?"
Throwing his voice and pretending to be the ho...

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