H20 Jokes

K9P

They both enjoy a nice glass of water, because what kind of bar has hydrogen peroxide on tap?

“I’ll have H20” says the 1st.

“I’ll have H20, too” says the 2nd.

The bartender doesn’t have a clue what they want because he flunked out of high school, and started working at a bar.

Drinking

The second chemist died.

The man died of ingesting hydrogen peroxide.

H2O^3

For them H2O is Eau.

The bartender says, “You damn fool! Don't ingest disinfectants! You’re supposed to be scientists—act like it, for pity’s sake. And how’d you even find an open bar violating the stay-at-home order?”

A few moments after the big bang a cloud full of Hydrogen atoms fall into a blackhole and die. The arrive at the border between multiverses and meet Saint Platinum-Erbium

St PtEr says to them "Welcome to Heaven. In a moment I will let you all through, but before I may do that, I must ask each... read more

"Doctor, I don't feel thirst and keep finding myself always dehydrated". "Drink 8 glasses of fluid a day as a guideline" adviced the doctor.

"Can I count in fruit juice?" asked the man. "Since they do contain a bit of sugar, don't forget to supplement the fluid intake with H20 too" replied th... read more

A waiter comes round and asks them what they would like

Chemist 1: I’ll have some H20 please

Chemist 2: I’ll have some h20 too

Chemist one smiles, knowing his assasination was a success

The first scientist says, "I'll have some H20."
The second scientist says, "I'll have a glass of water, too, Wh.. why did you say H20? Like, I know it's the chemical formula for water and all. but it's the end of the day and there's really no need to intentionally over-complicate things like tha... read more

Bartender comes around

The bartender: What will you be having?

Scientist 1: I’ll have some H20

The bartender hands him a glass of water

The bartender: And you?

Scientist 2: I’ll have some H20 also

Scientist 2’s arch nemesis disguised as the bartender: -Snaps... read more

They sit at the counter and one chemist orders for his buddy.
“I’ll have a glass of H20, and he’ll have a glass of H20 too.”

The bartender is noticeably confused and looks to the gentlemen at the end of the bar.

The linguist replies. “Water you looking at me for?”

Two chemists walk into a restaurant after work, they sit down at there table and order drinks. The first chemist says, "I will have some H20", the second chemist says, "I will have a glass of water, and dude why are you referring to it so strangely, we aren't at work anymore."

The first chemi... read more

...for what he thought was H20 was H2SO4!

2 hydrogen atoms are going at it, the one H atom says to the other, this is boring there’s no spark anymore, we should do something about this. The one hydrogen atom thinks about his friend oxygen atom, calls him up and tells him what’s up. So oxygen atom comes over and him and hydrogen atom start t... read more

And ask for water.

And the bartender gives them water.

Because regardless of scientific naming, both understand the most common naming and that referring to water as H20 is really only relevant language amongst their peers.

When the waiter asked the what to drink, the first scientist said, "I'll have H2O." The second scientist started to say "I'll have H20 too," but then he told the first scientist, "Wait a minute. You had something up your sleeves, didn't you?" He then told the waitress, "I'll have a glass of water." ... read more

They go up to the bartender, Germanium, and start to order their drinks, but soon realise they are short on cash.

Hydrogen says to Germanium, "Hey man, we've had a long week, bonding is hard. If we can make you laugh, can we drink for free tonight?"

Germanium thinks about it for a min... read more

Teacher: John, give me a sentence starting with " I ".
John: I is...
Teacher: No, John. Always say, "I am."
John: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

Teacher: John, how do you spell "crocodile"?
John: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
Teacher: No, that's wrong
John: Mayb... read more