I am so bored now, So I applied for The NHS volunteer scheme.

Turns out they've got enough gynaecologist, Just waiting to hear back from the breast clinic.

Boris promised 40 new NHS hospitals over the next ten years.

At this rate, it'll only take him about a month and a half.

The NHS has just revealed a list of long-term side effects of vaccines!

- Old age
- Grey hair
- General decrease of diseases

Hand Washing Lyrics

**Neil Diamond:** Hands...
**NHS:** Yep, wash them for 20 seconds
**Neil Diamond**: Touching hands..
**NHS:** No, don't do that
**Neil Diamond:** Reaching out..
**NHS:** Errrr, avoid that too
**Neil Diamond:** Touching me..
**NHS:** Oh no
### **Neil Diamond:**...

Margaret Thatcher appears to Boris Johnson in a dream...

"Privatise the NHS and paint the Houses of Parliament green!" she says to Johnson



Johnson looks confused; "Why green?"



Thatcher smiles, "I knew you wouldn't object to the first part"

It's a good thing Breaking Bad wasn't made in England.

A show about a school teacher going to NHS for cancer treatments would suck.

I was disappointed by the British version of Breaking Bad.

It ends after he gets cancer and all his treatment is paid for by the NHS.

Poorly paid UK surgeons

Yesterday I found out that NHS surgeons are so poorly paid that they have to resort to crime.

I saw a sign, it said "Thieves operate in this area."

English version of Breaking bad in progress

It will last one season with only one episode where Walt will be diagnosed with Cancer but will get treated by NHS and wil end up living on benefits.

One minute, you're getting drunk as a skunk, then the next minute, you're in the back of an ambulance.

I really shouldn't be working for the NHS.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My dad's 5:30 AM sense of humor

My ex-gf was over the house, and we were waking up early to go down to massachusetts early one thursday morning (we live in NH).


We never would wake up early so her being up and moving at 530 surprised him.


As she comes out of the bathroom he asks " What are you two doing up s...

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