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English Speaking Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What did the horny English speaking ghost say to the hive?

Boo bees!

I said to my English speaking girlfriend, “Today I meet a guy who posts on Reddit.”

“That’s ‘met a’,” she replied.

A Mafia Leader Is Robbed By One of His Foreign Non-English Speaking Associate

The leader figures out who stole the money and hires a translator in order to properly communicate.

Leader: So you're the one who had the guts to steal my money?

Translator (proceeds): He said he didn't do it.

Leader: Tell him to cut the bulls*** and tell me how much he stole....

Non English speaking mom boasts about my profession to her friends "My son is a Racist!!!"

MOM! ITS RACER!

Have you ever tried to get french bread in a english speaking country ?

It's a pain

My new French speaking friend who recently moved to our very English speaking city just got a new dog...

My french buddy (we'll call Mikey to save his dignity) got himself a new dog last week. So Mikey wanted to take him to the the dog park and since I have a well trained dog he asked me to come along to give him some pointers. So just the other day I meet him at one of the more popular dog parks in th...

On holiday in Spain I saw a sign saying English speaking doctors, I thought what a good idea/

We should have them in England.

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