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Denier Jokes

How do you talk with a COVID denier

with an Ouija board

Why do January 6 deniers never last very long in Dungeons & Dragons campaigns?

They always fail their Constitution checks.

How do you talk to a COVID denier

Without raising your voice so you do not disturb the other patients in the mental health ward.

The Norwegian and the Covid-denier

One day an Norwegian and a covid-denier were fishing on opposite sides of the same river, but the Norwegian guy was catching all of the fish.

Eventually, the covid-denier asks the Norwegian, "How do you get to the other side?"

The Norwegian guy responds, "I'll turn on my flashlight and...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did the proctologist Covid-denier take up ventriloquism?

He got tired of talking out of his own ass.

What's a COVID denier's favorite video game?

Space Invaders.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do pedophiles and climate change deniers have in common? [NSFW]

They both enjoy fucking the next generation.

I don't understand Holocaust deniers.

I think those people are in the wrong camp.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Argument With A Climate Change Denier

The denier goes, “How can global warming be real if it’s 20 degrees here?”

I say to him, “Saying Climate Change isn’t real because it’s cold where you live is like saying smart people don’t exist because you’re a fucking idiot!”

Why are conservatives climate change deniers?

Because they want to melt the snowflakes!

A North Korean, a Uiyghur, and a covid-denier are driving through the desert...

A North Korean, a Uiyghur, and a covid-denier are driving through the desert when their car breaks down. Each of them agrees to take one item as they have to continue through the desert on foot.

The North Korean and the covid-denier ask the Uiyghur what he is going to take. He responds, "I wi...

What month celebrates Holocaust deniers?

July.

A climate scientist and a climate-change denier walk into a bar

The climate-change denier goes to the bartender and asks for the strongest drink in the house.

The bartender takes out a bottle and says, "This is Absinthe, about 75% alcohol. Can I sell you a glass?"

The climate-change denier gets all upset and leaves the bar in a huff. The climate sc...

Two covid deniers are taking a walk in the woods when they encounter a sheep...

Two covid deniers were out taking a walk in the woods when they discovered a sheep with its head stuck in a fence.

The first denier pulls down his pants and gets to business.

Completing, he turns to his friend and said, "Now it's your turn."

The other covid denier then sticks hi...

I dumped my girlfriend after she falsely claimed Netflix was the cheapest streaming service.

I refuse to associate with a Hulu-cost denier.

I've had it with climate change deniers...

The global warming truthers are so anti-climatic!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Google is now filtering out Holocaust denier websites from searches

Now we will nazi those results.

An anti-vaxxer, a flat-earther and a holocaust denier walked into a bar

but got turned down by the bartender.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you get when you cross Donald Trump with a Holocaust Denier?

Fake jews.

what did the ufo denier say when shown undeniable video proof of alien spaceships and was even told that one of those spaceships houses the leader of the universe?

“which craft?”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two Covid deniers die of Covid and go to heaven. God tell them they can ask anything they want and get the truth....

Two Covid deniers die of Covid and go to heaven. God tell them they can ask anything they want and get the truth

Covid Denier 1: So there was no such thing as covid, right? I died of lung cancer or something!

God: No, Covid is real, you died of covid just like the Doctors said.
...

I think Holocaust deniers actually took what happened worse than the rest of us...

I mean, they’re still stuck on the first stage of grief.

Two schoolgirls are talking about who to vote for Class President.

"I'm voting for Mark. He's so dreamy!"

"I'm not voting for that big horndog. Every time he sees me he gets turned on. He tries to act like it's not happening, but it's pretty obvious."

"So?"

"I'm not voting for an erection denier."

How many climate change deniers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

What are you talking about? The bulb is fine.

I bought some pantyhose but they kept telling me climate change wasn't real

I should have checked the Denier rating

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

2020 Holiday Album

We're getting ahead of the curve and releasing this year's 2020 Holiday Album including such hits as:

1- Baby It's Covid Outside

2- Walking In A Pandemic Wonderland

3- Grandma Got Ran Over By A Protestor

4- Karen, Did You Know

5- Zoom Christmas

6- Frosty The...

What's worse than infected soil in the greenhouse?

A global warming denier in the White House.

Say what you want about the people wearing 6MWE shirts

At least they weren't Holocaust Deniers.

[long] Irving worked at a Jewish deli and bakery, and he loved most of his regular clientele, except for one guy...

... this guy would *always* haggle over how much he should spend, even for things that had a fixed rice clearly marked on the menu board.

One day, the guy comes in, and says, "I want to buy your finest loaf of egg bread for Rosh Hashanah. I have a crisp five-dollar bill for you, Irving, my go...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Friday Update - Jokes for the week of 3/16-3/22

A new study shows sugary drinks cause over 180k deaths a year, only 4 of which are from being crushed by a soda machine. I like those odds!

Japan has created a remote controlled mobile toilet, because sometimes you just gotta go.

A North Korean spokesman has said that its nuclear arms ...

A Democrat wakes up after being in a year-long coma...

...and immediately calls the doctor over to his hospital bed.

"Doctor, I need to know; who won the election? Was it Sanders? Clinton?"

The doctor shakes her head. "Let me put it this way: there's good news and there's bad news."

"What's the bad news?" the Democrat asks.

"...

Topical Jokes (5/20)

Welcome back, everybody! We've got some more news and, thus, more jokes. Let's get started.

Right off the bat, more on President Obama. Following a week of scandals, President Obama played golf with Transportation Secretary Ray LaHood. Things got a little tense when Obama had IRS agents audit...

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