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Craig Ferguson Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A danish artist painted pictures of naked women with his penis.

An interested buyer visits his gallery and asks:
"how can u paint those gentle round curves with your penis"
"It wasn't too hard"

got that from the late late show with craig ferguson.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I bought my wife a pair of shoes and a dildo.

If she doesn't like the shoes, she can go fuck herself.

(Shamelessly stolen from Craig Ferguson)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I got my wife her Christmas present

For Christmas I got her a pair of shoes. If she doesn't like the vibrator she can go take a hike.

No, that's not it...

If she doesn't like the shoes she can go fuck herself.

(Heard it on Craig Ferguson's stand-up special)

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