This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A danish artist painted pictures of naked women with his penis.

An interested buyer visits his gallery and asks:
"how can u paint those gentle round curves with your penis"
"It wasn't too hard"

got that from the late late show with craig ferguson.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I bought my wife a pair of shoes and a dildo.

If she doesn't like the shoes, she can go fuck herself.

(Shamelessly stolen from Craig Ferguson)

People are mad because MTV doesn't show music videos. What about Fox News?

They haven't shown a fox in months.

(Craig Ferguson)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I got my wife her Christmas present

For Christmas I got her a pair of shoes. If she doesn't like the vibrator she can go take a hike.

No, that's not it...

If she doesn't like the shoes she can go fuck herself.

(Heard it on Craig Ferguson's stand-up special)

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