UPJOKE
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Aka Jokes

What the difference between Vladimir Putin and Vlad the impaler (AKA Dracula)?

One sucks the blood of innocents and possesses eternal youth, the other is Dracula.

Curtis Jackson, aka 50 cent, considering to run for office. His first campaign slogans released.

Change we can believe in! The change we need!

A pop star who summons ghosts, AKA...

Seancé

A woman was seated next to President Coolidge (aka “silent Cal”) at a dinner party.

“I bet my friend that I would be able to get more than two words out of you tonight,” she said.

“You lose,” he replied.

What was the name of the huge boat that was built to harbour a mole of each element in order to not have them go extinct due to the big flood aka the big crunch of the universe?

NaOH's Ark

Think about this

AKA is also known as also known as

What Do You Get When You Mix Breaking Bad With Fast Food?

Walter Whitecastle, aka “Heisenburger”.

Why can’t ghosts have babies?

cause they have halloweenies.


aka. my favorite joke in seventh grade.

Geometry and Spiderman

Peter Parker (aka Spiderman) is taking geometry in high school and, surprisingly, has a lot of trouble with it, especially when it comes to circles.

He asks his girlfriend, Mary Jane, for help figuring out the circumference of a circle. Mary Jane tries explaining it a few different ways, but...

I need your hilarious minds.

Help me come up with a funny thing to dress up as for a party that’s themed “be my date on this date”. AKA, dress up as a day of the year or holiday. Fave idea so far is going as a box for boxing day.

How to name a virus... WHO version:

WHO HQ in 2003:
: There’s a new type of corona virus outbreak in Guangdong province in China.
: Let's call it Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome aka SARS.
: Excellent name. It does not refer to any specific location or people. So no one will be blamed or feared for it.

Also WHO ...

Gynaecologist

aka female private investigator

Celebrating Good Friday by honoring Jesus

aka doing the same thing he did today and hanging with my Bros.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Peter and his grandfather are looking down at their town...

And Peter points to this cluster of houses. "You see those houses, grandpa? I built those. But do people call me Peter the House Builder? No..."

Then he points to the church in the middle of town. "And that church. I built that. And do people call me Peter the Church Builder? No..."

Th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Pretty meta bro

Cake day posts are annoying and uncreative, so many people make anti cake day posts. These can be just as bad, and are only rarely funny if they are posted on the poster's cake day, (aka: anti cake day cake day posts). This possess a bit of a conundrum, as here in Reddit, we make fun of things, but ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This is a true story:

Mmmmmmmaaaaaaaaannnnnnnn! I just left the Mobil (gas station). I pulled up to get some gas and saw two police officers looking at a woman smoking while pumping gas. I'm like really look at this shit! And the police looked like they were thinking the same thing! So I go in to pay for the gas n grab s...

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