This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Taliban

Two afghans fleeing the Taliban
A1: Hurry! We've to leave now.
A2: What about the goats?
A1: Fuck the goats!
A2: Really? Do we still have the time?

Julius Caesar and Marcus Brutus are at the airport

Brutus: “Which is our boarding gate Caesar?”
Caesar: “A-2 Brutus”

Brutus: “And what time is the flight Caesar?”
Caesar: “8:02 Brutus”

Brutus: “By the way, I have sandwiches. Do you want one Caesar?”
Caesar: “Ate two Brutus”

Brutus: “This is an unusual paper size for a t...

A small quiz

Q1: what do you call someone who can speak 3 languages fluently?

A1: trilingual

Q2: what do you call someone who can speak 2 languages fluently?

A2: bilingual

Q3:what do you call someone who can only speak 1 language?

A3:American

So, in "Infinity War"...

Doctor Strange is in battle with Thanos. He sees all the future scenarios that are possible. He lets Thanos get the infinity gauntlet, allowing the deaths of half the universe. He never tells anyone what exactly he saw. The other Avengers saw this as being an incredibly cruel decision to make.
...

Since there have been a few math jokes lately...

Q1. What do you get if you cross a mountain lion with a mountain goat?

A1. ||mountain lion|| ||mountain goat|| sin θ


Q2. What do you get when you cross a mountain lion with a mountain climber?

A2. You can't - the mountain climber is a scalar.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Test For a Dirty Mind

**Q1:** What's 6 inches long, has 2 nuts and makes girls fat?
> **A1:** [ Almond Joy ](#s)

**Q2:** What sticks out of a man's pajamas that you can hang a hat on?
> **A2:** [ His head ](#s)

**Q3:** What does a dog do on three legs, a man do on two legs and a woman do sittin...

Wait, which one's my seat again?

(At the Roman Theatre)

Brutus: Wait, which one's my seat again?

Julius (sighs) : A2, Brute.

\#IdesOfMarch

An elderly couple's road trip around south east England

*(Note for those unfamiliar with the British road network: 'A' roads are main, or arterial, roads and they are all identified by 'A' and a number.)*


An elderly man is driving his wife on a road trip around the south east of England. Shortly after getting on to the A2, a police car signals...

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