3pm Jokes

He knows he has to ring it but doesn't know how. Then he has an idea. He takes a big run up and uses his face to ring it. Bloodied and cut he does it again. Battered and bruised he does it one more time, but the bell swings back and knocks him off the tower down to the floor below.

Lying dea... read more

They even had a shift differential!

After my first couple weeks I received a case of hotdogs along with my paycheck. I thought nothing of it, but then it happened again next payday, and honestly the paycheck felt a little short.

I approached my boss and asked him what the deal was.... read more

She was very flexible.

Both times she said no

Guy: I went to your place and there was nobody there.
Girl: I told you!

This puzzled the medical staff, so a group of doctors decided to keep a watch on the bed in secret and waited for the fateful hour.
At 3pm, the door to the ward slowly opened, then a cleaner came in, disconnected the life support machine and plugged in a vacuum cleaner.

I'M ASKING FOR A FRIEND............... A good friend of mine has two tickets for the 2022 Super Bowl, 50 yard line box seats. He paid $2,500 each but he didn't realize last year when he bought them, it was going to be on the same day as his wedding. If you are interested, he is looking for someone t... read more

“I’d like to apply to toll the bell, every hour on the hour” he tells the priest. The priest wonders how this would be possible with no arms so he decides to humor the man. Since it’s close to 3pm, they make their way up to the bell tower. At 2:54 the man sits cross legged and begins meditating. At ... read more

I didn't get the reasoning, but I scheduled my wedding for 3pm just to be sure.

He said he'll arrive between 3pm and 7.30pm.

First boy: My dad is the fastest. Last week he bought a Porsche and it can drive faster than 300km/h.

Second boy: That’s nothing. My dad is a pilot in the military. His Jet flies faster than 1000km/h.

Third boy: Guys... My dad still is the fastest. He works for the government and his q... read more

This coming Sunday happens to be his 25th wedding anniversary. He wants to play golf as usual. His wife wants him to spend the whole day with her. They come to a compromise - he'll play 9 holes first thing in the morning and then come straight home.

The wife is expecting him home at around 10... read more

And ends up in an alternate universe, inhabited by a people known as the Trids. They take him in and are friendly, but every day at exactly 3 pm a they all bury their heads in the ground. Eventually the rabbi gets curious enough to ask them why they do that. Their leader replies that sometimes a gia... read more

CLASSIC VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no f... read more

He lacks experience in the service industry but his missing arms severely limit his ability to perform manual labour. Everyday he goes out looking for work and everyday he comes back dejected.

One morning—while flipping through the classifieds with his toes—he comes across the following ad,... read more