UPJOKE
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136 days!

Three guys are celebrating in a bar.

They keep high-fiving each other and yelling, "136 days!" "136 days!"

They are so excited, the bartender can't stand it any longer.

"Hey," he says, "what are you guys celebrating?"

"We finished a jigsaw puzzle!" says one of them. <...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

They DoD realized they have too many Generals.

So they offer a retirement package where they have a doctor measure the distance between any two points on their body and they get $10,000 for every inch.

An Air Force General is the first two take the offer and has the doctor measure him from the top of this head to the bottom of this feet. ...

You ever heard of the ocean located at 5.694647° S, 136.987557° W?

I like to call it the specific ocean.

A man goes to prison

Its his first day in the prison, a while later he sees his cellmate go the the door and yells trough it: "#12!", and a few people from different cells chuckle. A few hours later another man goes to the door and yells: "#31!", and a few people start laughing, even the guards smile. Then having gathe...

22 mph speed limit

Sitting on the side of the road waiting to catch speeding drivers, a state trooper sees a car puttering along at 22 mph. He thinks to himself, "This driver is as dangerous as a speeder!" So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over.

Approaching the car, he notices that there are five e...

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