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Yoko Jokes

What do Ethiopians and Yoko Ono have in common?

They are both living off of dead beatles.

What did Yoko say when John Lennon was murdered?

"Ono..."

The Beatles were recording in a studio. John says, "Look! Yoko's here"

Paul, George and Ringo say: O no

What did John and Yoko say when their son wouldn't eat his vegetables?

"All we are saying is give peas a chance."

What's the difference between Reddit CEO Ellen Pao, and Yoko Ono?

.....about 40 years.

I have ranked the greatest musicians of all time in order:

Nelly

Erika Badu

Vanilla Ice

Eminem

Rhianna




Green Day

Oasis

Nirvana

Nine inch Nails

Aerosmith



George Strait

Ilene Woods

Vince Gill

Enya



Yoko ono

Otis Redding

U...

Rick Astley and James Blunt are in a bar having a pint

And they are talking about all the celebrities they knew :-

Rick Astley said "I met Yoko Ono in Soho once" but James had never met her before

James mentioned he was good friends with Carrie Fisher, unfortunately Rick had never met her

Rick Mentioned once going to dinner with ...

Turning back the clock an hour in 2020

Is like getting a bonus track on a Yoko Ono album.

It's been scientifically proven that John Lennon did some much LSD in the 60s.....

That he fell in love with Yoko Ono.

What's got two legs and lives off dead beetles?

Yoko Ono.

The assassination of John Lennon is one of the biggest tragedies in music

Not even one of the five bullets hit Yoko Ono

No! No! No! I will not eat my vegetables!

...shouted young Sean, to his mother Yoko.

Needing some help, she called out to the boy's father, "John! John! Please come here!"

"What seems to be the trouble?" he asked.

Looking up, Sean cried out, "They taste terrible, they smell funky and they're an ugly green color! I will ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What’s yellow and lives off dead beetles?

Yoko Ono.

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The Beatles have reformed and have brought out a new album. It’s mostly drum and bass.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My Dad sent me this email titled "Politically Correct Jokes"

Last night I reached for my liquid Viagra and accidentally swigged from a bottle of Tippex.
I woke this morning with a huge correction.



The wife suggested I get myself one of those penis enlargers .......
So I did.... she's 21 and her name's Lucy



My girlfriend sa...

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