A farmer is sitting in the neighbourhood bar getting soused.

A man comes in and asks him "Hey, why are you sitting here on this beautiful day getting drunk?"

Farmer: "Some things you just can't explain."

Man: "So what happened that's so horrible?"

Farmer: "Well, today I was sitting by my cow milking her. Just as I got the bucket about ...

What does Karl Marx, a bus driver and a sous chef at a 5-star restaurant have in common?

Everything, if Marx had his way.

Why did the cannibal hire a sous chef?

He needed a hand with dinner.

Entente cordial

Why was the French Sous chef suicidal?
Because he'd lost his H'uil d'olive....

If you kill a Sous Chef...

Does it count as Suicide?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a Japanese female Sous chef?

A Sous She Chef

Me: HOW COULD YOU LET YOUR EVIL BABY SHEEP ESCAPE? Sous: I hid it away with Gordon Ramsey.

Me: WHERE’S THE DAMNED LAMB SOUS??!!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

No beers to bears in bars in Boise.

A bear walks into a bar and asked the bartender for a beer. To which the barkeep points over his shoulder at a sign reading, "It is illegal to serve if you are already intoxicated. It is illegal to serve minors. It is illegal to serve beer to bears in bars in Boise."

The bear says, "If you do...

Jack woke up at home with a terrible hangover and black eye.

The first thing he sees is a single rose on the side table and a note from his wife: “Dear, breakfast is made. I’ve gone shopping to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you!”

He stumbles to the kitchen and, sure enough, there’s breakfast. “Joe,” he says to his son, “what happened la...

What do you call a lawyer who likes to cook?

A Sous-Chef

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If Dr. Seuss wrote instruction manuals.

If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port,
and the bus is interrupted as a very last resort,
and the address of the memory makes your floppy disk abort,
then the socket packet pocket has an error to report.

If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash,
and the double-...

Swear on my life this is a true story. An experienced cook in my kitchen just slipped and fell in a fryer....

Was mostly ok, definitely could have gone worse as far as oil burns go. His elbow and a portion of his forearm were burned pretty serious and the whole kitchen had stopped and the sous chef was giving him medical attention when the new young cook, who people were still trying to warm up to, goes...

What do you get when you cross a lawyer with a cook?

A sous chef

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A cop walking his beat downtown late one Saturday night...

...comes across an inebriated fellow, stumbling around on the sidewalk in front of a bar. He approaches the drunkard, who is well plastered and hasn't yet seen him coming . "Evening, friend. How we doing tonight?"

"Oh officer," says the souse, " Am I glad to see you, sir! Listen, somebody...

Restaurant contest

Last weekend I went to one of those restaurants where you can see into the kitchen, it was at that weird time between lunch and dinner and the place was quite empty. I could see there was some kind of contest going on between some of the staff.

First I saw one of the waitresses hold up an inc...

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