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Reflect On Jokes

How do a Cannibal and Stoner Reflect on their Journey, Together?

"Maybe the real treasure was the friends we baked along the way."

Every morning when I jog I reflect on my life and I want to throw up.

It's a running gag.

Why are vampires so impulsive?

They never reflect on things.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

In Texas, close to the border with Mexico, there was a priest who hated Mexicans

That Sunday, after reading the Bible, the priest started his sermon:

"Today we'll reflect on Peter's lie about being a follower of Jesus. That night, Peter acted as a coward and a liar, just like these damn Mexicans we see every day in this town!"

The whole congregation started to shou...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three men run out of gas at a farm in the middle of nowhere.

Nothing is in sight and the nearest gas station was far beyond walking distance.


The three men decide to knock on the door and ask the farmer for gas. The farmer agrees to give them gas but only in exchange for a favor. His daughter was desperate to be laid.


The men looked at e...

Still can't decide if I need a mirror or not

I need to reflect on this

A man wearing a mirrored suit....

A man wearing a mirrored suit started a fight downtown.
The police stopped the fight and told the man to reflect on his actions

Once upon a time...

Once upon a time, there was a young man named Done. He was born and raised in the town of Moroccan. Done wasn't very smart, and he was always teased by his peers when he expressed his desire to become a doctor, especially by a disliked and harsh-tempered teacher who would yell at him, "You drive me ...

4 Husbands

The local news station was interviewing an 80-year-old lady because she had just gotten married for the fourth time. The interviewer asked her questions about her life, about what it felt like to be marrying again at 80, and then about her new husband's occupation.

"He's a funeral director,"...

If you talk to a mirror, are you actually talking to the mirror, or is the mirror talking to you?

Please reflect on this in your notebooks.

Why are all vampires bad people?

They can't really reflect on who they are.

What happens when cats become philosophical?

They like to paws and reflect on life

Why did the mirror's parents dislike it misbehaving?

They were concerned about how it would reflect on them.

I work in a mirror factory

I broke a polishing machine a few days ago and my boss told me to reflect on what I've done.

I told him I couldn't because the mirrors were too blurry but I'll polish on my actions

It's fun being a philosophy major

I get to reflect on why I can't pay for food

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Bob the ant wanted to be a stand-up comedian

He had a wild, bold, and crazy personality and sense of humor. He knew he would be hilarious if he just had the opportunity to get in front of a crowd.
 

So Bob the ant went around town auditioning for gigs. He let his crazy attitude go full force at the judges. They weren’t too impressed,...

What color are mirrors?

I don't know, let's reflect on this.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three men are captured by a group of Cannibals.

The men are tied up and brought before leader of the cannibals. The leader says to the men "My people are hungry, but I will let you make your case. Then I will decide your fate."

The first man, hair slicked back and dressed in an expensive suit, begins, "I am very wealthy, and I have founded...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Joe, Dave, Tommy, and Rodney start a folk rock band. Joe plays cymbals, Dave is on the 6-string, Tommy has the drums, and Rodney adds his unique twang to the vocals.

Their very first rehearsal, they come up with a great idea for an original composition. It takes heavy liberties with the cymbal part. Joe is ecstatic; cymbal players rarely ever get the recognition they deserve. This could be a revolution in the music industry!

They begin tuning and setting ...

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