Record Store Jokes - 16 Hilarious Record Store Jokes

The world leading expert on wasps is walking down the street when he passes a record store.

In the window he sees a record called "wasps of the world, and the sounds they make". Intrigued, he walks into the store.
He says to the shopkeeper "I'll have that wasp record in the window please. You know I'm the world leading expert in wasps, there are thousands of different species of wasp, ...

I went to a record store, they said they specialized in hard-to-find records…

nothing was alphabetized!

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I just started working in a record store.

A Shifty Looking Guy walks in and says.

"got anything by The Doors?"

I said "yes 2 cameras and an alarm, now fuck off"!

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Darth Vader walks into a record store.

Clerk: ‘Sorry, your excellency, we don’t have that George Michael album in stock.’

Vader: ‘I find your lack of “Faith” disturbing.’

I tried to open a record store in Tel Aviv.

Perhaps The Vinyl Solution was a poor choice of name.

I was working in a record store when a gentleman asked me if we had anything from the most popular prog-rock band from Canada.

I said I'd be with him in a moment. He said "OK. No rush.".

I replied "Sorry. I can't help you then."

A man walks into a record store...

A man walks into a record store, looking confused. The owner approaches him:
"Hey, you seem a little lost. Can I show you where anything is?"
"Uh yes, actually.", the man replies, "I'm looking for some classical music, as I've never listened to it before."
"Oh, well we have a vast var...

I don't get why record stores fail.

They have record sales every year

A young man walks into a record store and asks the clerk, “Do you have anything by the Doors?”

“Sure,” replies the clerk, “a mop bucket and a fire extinguisher.”

Wrong number

A woman meant to call a record store but dialed the wrong number and got a private home instead. "Do you have 'Eyes of Blue' and 'A Love Supreme'?" she asked.

"Well, no," answered the puzzled homeowner. "But I have a wife and eleven children."

"Is that a record?" she inquired.
...

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Exciting news, I recently broke several new records.

The owner of the record store was kind of a jerk about it though.

The world's leading expert on European wasps and the sounds they make is walking down the street.

He passes a record store that's advertising a sale. The sign says "45 RPM Vinyl First Editions, European Wasps and The Sounds They Make." Naturally, he's intrigued. So he stops on in and says to the record man, "excuse me, but I am the worlds leading expert on European Wasps and the sounds they make...

So I go to for some careers advice...

"What do you want to do?" asked the advisor.

"I want to work in a record store", I replied.

"Is that your vinyl answer?"

A misunderstanding

A girl is driving down the highway listening to the radio when a song comes on that she really, really likes. The DJ says the name of that song was "Hot lips and tender kisses." The girl says to herself I've got to buy that record. She pulls over and looks up the phone number for the nearest record ...

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In my day, we never had Pirate Bay and Limewire

We had to walk two miles to the record store and shoplift that shit.

Bulls on a Parade

On a hot sunny day, I went to a record store. A song was playing on the speakers. Angrily, I picked up a hammer and started banging the speaker system.
The confused owner asked, "What is this?"
I said, "Rage Against the Machine."

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