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One Piece Jokes

What type of bathing suit did Luffy want Nami to wear?

A One Piece.

What happened when Luffy found the one piece?

There was a note that read, "Congratulations now find the other 99 pieces."

My friend told me this One Piece joke, so I figured I'd share it to reddit.

What did one piece of toast say to the other piece of toast, inside the toaster?

It’s toasty in here!

I’m tired of my friend complaining about missing one piece of his 10k puzzle…

If he thinks that’s bad, I’m missing 9999 pieces.

Netflix’s new live-action anime adaption “One Piece” bombs despite majority positive reviews from critics and audiences

The studio blames their poor numbers off the series glorifying piracy.

I recently ordered one piece of sodium and one piece of copper.

When the delivery guy showed up, I noticed that he was only holding the sodium. I asked him,

"Did you have the copper with you?"

He replied,

"Na right now, Cu later."

What's the one piece of advice that would benefit both a tightrope walker and a guy getting a b.j. from an 85-year-old woman?

"Don't look down."

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A husband comes home to his wife after being fired from the pickle factory...

His wife asks him "So what happened?"

The husband explains "I often get bored at work and today my mind was wandering and I thought to myself 'what would happen if I stuck my penis inside the pickle slicer?'"

The wife is clearly blind-sided by this confession and doesn't know what to s...

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There was a Bravest man in the world contest

There were three brave contenders that had to survive three missions and survive.
1# swim one lap in an Olympic pool filled with crocodiles.
2# shake the hand of a raged gorilla
3# fuck the brains out of an 100 year little old lady.

First contender got it to the pool and was eaten al...

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How often does a poo come out in one piece?

About one turd of the time.

What did one piece of toast say to the other piece of toast as they were vigorously rubbing against each other?

Don't stop I'm about to crumb.

What did one piece of limestone say to the other?

"I think we need to chalk..."

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What do you call a poop that all comes out in one piece?

A mono-log.

After realising they only had one piece of fruit left, a starving crew rioted against their captain.

It was the last strawberry.

A redneck brings a roadkilled deer on his flight and stuffs it in the overhead compartment.

The flight attendant asks him what the hell he thinks he's doing.

"I thought you said we was allowed one piece of carrion?"

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A man and a woman were dating. She, being of a religious nature, had held back the worldly pleasure that he wanted from her so badly. In fact, he had never even seen her naked.

One day, as they slowly drove down the freeway, she remarked about his slow driving habits. "I can't stand it anymore," she told him. "Let's play a game. For every 5 miles per hour over the speed limit [60 MPH] you drive, I'll remove one piece of clothing."

He enthusiastically agreed and sped...

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I actually find one piece bathing suit to be more sexy.

Doesn't matter if you keep the top or the bottom.

A man was having a few in the local bar

when he noticed a sailor sitting at the other end of the bar. The sailor had a completely normal physique except for one anomaly: his head was tiny, about the size of an orange.

The man stared at the sailor in puzzlement, and after a few more drinks screwed up his courage to go over and ask t...

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A guy gets to the front of the line at the grocery store…

And takes the items out of his cart - one banana, one can of soup, one piece of chicken, one potato, one can of soda.

The cashier looks at him and says, “Let me guess, you’re single?”

The guy says, “I am, how did you know?”

Cashier says, “Because you’re ugly as fuck!”

When i told my dad i was joining the Air Force, he gave me one piece of advice...

Son, always pay attention on the flight line, because if you don't, you will be mist.

Finally watching One Piece and just saw tiny Buggy the Clown get spit out by a bird that tried to eat him.

I guess he tasted funny.

What did Edward Newgate say when he sailed to the Middle East? [Fixed]

THE ONE PIECE ISRAEL

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An Arabian oil tycoon met this very attractive lady and fell absolutely in love with her. so he proposed to her, claiming he would be able to grant her anything in the world. The lady not wanting to offend him by rejecting him outright, thought of ridiculous requests that are near unfulfillable

For the first request she said she'll only marry him if he buys her a 1000 acre mansion, thinking that there isn't and give up. Surprisingly the tycoon said "Ok, I build I build" and immediately gets his butler to contact a construction company to build it.

Next the lady decided to make her ...

How did the emperor steal Theseus's ship?

By replacing one piece at a time!

Perfect reason

Mother: I left two pieces of cake in the cupboard this morning, Johnny, and now there is only one piece left. Can you explain that?

Johnny: Well, I suppose it was so dark that I didn’t notice the other.

I think my anime jigsaw puzzle was too simple. It was...

...One Piece

Three CEOs of car companies are kidnapped.

They are told to either pay $1bn for release, or attempt to escape 3 hazard-filled miles out of the city using any method of transportation they choose.

The first CEO asks for a Ford Mustang. He makes it one mile before being spotted by a group of snipers and eliminated.

The second CEO...

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An ensign was spending his first few days aboard a submarine learning his duties and a litany of regulations.

His job was unusual, but simple; tend a pair of oxen in a miniature field on deck 7. The purpose of this agricultural endeavor was to see if crops might one day be grown inside a spaceship; a submarine was an adequate stand in.

He had never driven cattle before, but in short order, he got th...

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