An ancient Soviet joke

One day, while inspecting an army base, Stalin realises his pipe is missing. He calls his secret police to help him find it. When he goes home, he finds his pipe on his couch. He notifies the secret police.

"Comrade Nikolai, I have found my pipe already, stop all search operations for it."...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[NSFW] A Pole, a Russian and a German set a bet with the devil

They claim that within half a year each would set up a shop that would have everything in it.

When the time passes, the devil visits the Russian and sees a nice big shopping mall with lots of stores in it. The devil nods in appreciation:

"Nice shop you have here, Nikolai. You sure you ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Americans go hiking in the USSR

A group of american tourists came to the USSR and decided to go hiking in a traditional Soviet way. They got the tents, vodka, made a camp in the forest.

Suddenly a huge bear appears from the bushes, starts to roar and ruins the camp in a few seconds. The americans run as fast as they can fo...

If bad Russian puns

were worth a Nikolai would be rich.

3 Russian prisoners in a Gulag discuss their crimes

The first says, "I'm here because I spoke out against Nikolai Yezhov"


The second says, "I'm here because I spoke out in favor of Nikolai Yezhov"


Then, the two of them look at the third and recognize him. The third says, "Yes, it's me--Nikolai Yezhov"

A team of Russian atheletes did not do well at the Olympic Games.

A team of Russian atheletes did not do well at the Olympic Games. Putin summoned the team together with their head coach and his chief of KGB Nikolai to his office.

"You did not do a good job", - said Putin, - "But let us focus on the future. You will do much better in the next competition....

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