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New England Patriots Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

New England Patriots gates....

When they filmed the other teams practicing it was called "Spygate"

When Brady used deflated balls it was called "Deflategate"

Now that Bob Kraft is in trouble for visiting a full service massage parlor, would that be called, "Tailgate"?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What’s the difference between the New England Patriots, Donald Trump, and a prostitute?

Someone likes the prostitute!

New England Patriots’ Robert Craft is charged with soliciting prostitution.

He just wanted to show the masseuse where he wears his 6th super bowl ring.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the official electro-pop band of the New England Patriots?

Kraftjerk

What is the official snack food of the Boston Red Sox and New England Patriots?

Cheat-o's

New England Patriots list Aaron Hernandez out for week 1.

Suspended.

Why I am the way I am

My children asked me once why I am the way I am. So I told them.

One day, shortly after my first child was born, I came across an old lamp in a bundle of baby clothes. I wiped the lamp off, and a genie appeared and offered me three wishes. "But," the genie added, "your wishes will come with a...

A liar, a murderer, and a cheater walk into a bar.

The New England Patriots must be in town.

A man dies and goes to heaven

When he meets God, he asks, "God, is it true you love everyone?"

"Yes, my son."

"And so you can see the good in everyone?"

"Of course, my son."

And so the man begins asking questions about the most evil people he can think up: war criminals, mad scientists, corrupt politi...

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