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A woman had three daughters getting married the same day. Naturally she was worried about their sex life. It was agreed that they would send a discrete message.

Two weeks after the triple wedding the first message arrives. An ad for Maxwell House with the slogan "Good till the last drop." She's happy for her girl.

A month passes and a second message arrives with a Marlboro ad. "Marlboro: Extra long, extra strong." She's a little embarrassed, but happ...

Two old women are sitting on a porch smoking cigarettes.

Ask they are smoking, it begins to rain. The first woman's cigarette gets wet and goes out. As she looks at her friend, she sees something fascinating unfold.


Her friend has brought out a condom and a pair of small sewing scissors. She unrolls the condom, cuts off the end of it, and sl...

I just got back from Dubai where I was offered 40 camels for my wife.

I usually smoke Marlboro but hey... a deal's a deal.

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My pet beagle was originally liberated from an animal testing laboratory

Had to let her go. Too expensive. The little fucker smoked 80 Marlboros a day.

What I do If Iā€™m bored...

When Iā€™m bored, I go to a forum for women and ask if I should change to Marlboro light the last two months of my pregnancy.

Once I had a dog...

Once I had a dog name Marlboro who didn't have any legs. Sometimes I'd take him out and we'd go for a drag

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A man walks into a drugstore asking for viagra...

A man walks into a drugstore asking for viagra,

The pharmacist says he has two kinds, one that costs $20 and one that costs $30

The man asks for the one that costs $30, opens the bottle and pops a pill. He pulls out a credit card to pay and the pharmacist says

ā€œSorry, we donā€™t...

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A grandfather and grandson are fishing together...

A grandfather and his grandson are fishing together off of a dock. They are both sitting in silence until the grandfather pulls out a bottle of whiskey from his lunch bag and pours himself a glass. The grandson asks,

"Grandpa, may I please try some of your whiskey?"

To which the grand...

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So corporate exec Joe is flying across the Pacific, when his plane crashes. Joe survives, but finds himself stranded on a desert island, with nothing to eat but coconuts, and whatever seafood he can catch. 10 years go by, with poor Joe having no human contact. One day, as Joe is fishing for his dinn...

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