This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"Kidney stones?"

Hard pass.

It's obviously worse to pass a kidney stone than giving birth to a baby.

Because people always say they want another baby but no ones ever said they want another kidney stone.

How do you get a kidney stone?

By living a sedimentary life style.

Chuck Norris passed 6 kidney stones.

Thanos used them in the Infinity Gauntlet.

How do you know kidney stones are worse than pregnancy?

After a a kidney stone, nobody says “let’s have another”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My friend asked me if I wanted to buy his kidney stones.

I said that's a hard pass.

I passed my kidney stones with flying colors!

But mostly red.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What did the doctor say to the patient with kidney stones?

Urine trouble but it'll pass.

What happens when a kidney smokes weed?

It gets kidney stoned.

As told by my 11 year old son.

What did the kidney stone say to the man?

Urine trouble.

my husband, who works in a funeral home

Early one morning, my husband, who works in a funeral home, woke me, complaining of severe abdominal pains. We rushed to the emergency room, where they gave him a series of tests to determine the source of the pain.

My husband decided not to have me call in sick for him until we knew what was...

Found a cure for kidney stone.

Eat paper.

I've had kidney stones for my entire life and it seems that they'll always be there forever

They're infinity stones

Thanos goes to his urologist.

The urologist says, "Congrats Thanos, you now also have the kidney stone"

A man goes to doctor

Man: Why did you take my kidney out?
Doctor: You had kidney stones
Man: Then why didn't you take the stones out instead?
Doctor: I can't sell the stones

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A guy walks into a restaurant to drink wine.

When the waiter comes he orders a 1980 wine. The waiter goes to the kitchen, there are almost every type of wine there but can't find a 1980 wine. So he brings a glass of 1970 wine to the customer.
The customer takes a sip from the glass and he says
"This a 1970 wine, go bring me a 1980 wine...

My girlfriend likes golden meteor showers

(I have kidney stones)

Father Dave took a seat on the A train in NYC...

and was disgusted to see a drunk sitting across from him. The disheveled smelly man was wearing a t-shirt with a photo of a naked lady on it and he reeked of alcohol. The drunk stared at the priest for a few minutes and then blurted out "Father, what causes migraines and kidney stones?" THe priest g...

The doctor told Harry Potter to drink 2L of Water a Day, but Harry didn't listen.

Harry Potter and the Kidney Stone.

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