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Botany Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sexism is everywhere, even botany!

There is a stigma attached to female plants.

I know someone who faked his degree in botany.

He wrote his thesis on artificial Christmas trees.

Tony did all he could to avoid maths & decided to study Botany.

He later became famous for discovering that discarded tree trunks emit a regular pattern of sounds & is now focused on calculating the sounds.

After avoiding maths, he still ended up in a career solving Log rhythms

I saw a stand-up comic doing jokes about botany. Nobody in the audience laughed except one guy.

I looked at him and thought "you're a plant".

My uneducated neigbor was planning to grow a flowerbed in his backyard

But then he realised he can't plant flowers as he hadn't botany

While you're at someone's house, it's pretty easy to tell if they like plants.

Just look around and see if they botany.

As the first fleet rounded the headlands and sailed into Botany bay the local Aborigines could see several men looking towards them through big fancy telescopes. One of the Aborigines comments "stupid white man,

can't even play the didgeridoo".

Boll weevils are detrimental to cotton crops. If you had to have boll weevils on your farm, which do you want, a big weevil or a little weevil?

The little weevil, because you always want the *lesser of two weevils.*



My botany professor just told us this.

Pretty sure it's original, very rough edges type joke. Input welcome.

A man decides to open his own Plant Nursery. After a few months his business starts going under so he goes to apply for a loan
The loan officer goes to the place of business and asks a couple questions
"sir do you have a background in the study of plants?"
"No, I just got this company on a ...

You can’t plant flowers...

...if you haven’t botany.

I was going to give my friend books of jokes on the anatomy of plants

But I haven’t botany yet

I would have really liked to study plants in college...

but my university hadn’t botany.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A couple are discussing starting a garden

"You know, I really love the roses and chrysanthemums," remarked the wife. "Maybe I'll start by planting those."

"Oh sure, why not," replied the husband. "Hey, let's start doing that now! It's a beautiful Saturday morning and we don't have anything else to do."

"Alright, let me just ru...

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