If you think the Bluetooth speaker in the shower changed your life,

you haven't tried the stereo.

My Bluetooth speaker wasn't working so I threw it into the lake...

Now it's syncing.

If duct taping a Matchbox Trans Am to one's ear and pretending it's a Bluetooth device is wrong, then maybe—

hang on... I've gotta take this.

A Man Goes to the Doctor

A cancer patient anxiously awaits his doctor, who enters with his test results.

“Give it to me straight, doc,” he pleads. “How long have I got?”

“Ten,” says the doctor.

“Ten what? Months? Days? Years?” The patient cries.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” the doctor continues. “That was...

What type of knife do chefs use to connect to Bluetooth?

A pairing knife

There are hundreds of features on a brand-new BMW; heated seats, bluetooth audio, laser-headlights, etc... Which among them goes completely ignored?

The turn signals.

My friend told me that for minimal lag i should use an analogue connection instead of Bluetooth for my speaker system....

Sound advice.

People dating are like Bluetooth devices

They're supposed to pair up and connect but it hardly ever works

I didn’t know I had to actually put my electric toothbrush in my mouth!?!

I thought it was Bluetooth.

What do you call a prehistoric striped cat with a bluetooth headset?

A cybertoothed tiger

Why don't Bluetooth devices swim?

Because they're always trying to sync.

(My dad wrote this joke, just wanted to share it somewhere)

I'm great at fixing Bluetooth headsets...

... I just repair them.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I tried to submit a patent for a gold-plated, Bluetooth-ready butt plug, but Steve Jobs beat me to it.

It turns out he's already making overpriced toys for assholes!

Yo mama so stupid...

...she went to the dentist for a Bluetooth.

Men Are Like Bluetooth

Men Are Like Bluetooth…

Always Connected When Wife Is Around…
The Moment Wife Is Away…

They Automatically Starts Searching For New Devices…

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Victoria's Secret recently invented a bra that contains Bluetooth speakers ...

... because so many women had complained that men stare at their breasts instead of listening to them.

What's the difference between Bluetooth and The Titanic?

The Titanic sinks.

What do you get when you eat a blackberry?

A Bluetooth

*Joke at my local farmers market

Love should be like Bluetooth

When you are close, the status should be.....connected
When away...searching for a new device

What does a mouse play his music with?

A bluetooth squeaker.

Funniest thing my gf has ever said

We were at a a red light and i noticed a woman in the car behind me making a lot of arm and hand motions. No one was in the car with her (probably on bluetooth).

Me: Hey babe look at this woman behind us. What is she doing? She's just flailing her arms around but there isn't any one with her...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I put my phone under my pillow last night.

When I woke up it was gone and there was a £1 coin in it's place.

Fucking Bluetooth Fairy!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My Wife is missing.

Husband:

My wife is missing.

She went out yesterday and has not come home...



Sergeant at Police Station:

What is her height?



Husband:

Gee, I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall.



Sergeant:

Weight?



Husb...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was in the toilet when my friend sent me a porn video

I played it, no sound, I increased the volume to the highest still no sound, so I didn't bother.

I watched it for about 8 minutes before I remembered, my phone was connected to the Bluetooth player in the living room with my family and our guests are waiting for me.

I've been in the to...

David and Shane worked for a small furniture company which had recently developed a new product.

They had been developing a new kind of smart shelf, and it was finally finished. This shelf had everything! Part of it featured a built in wireless charger, there were USB ports, part of it could flip up to reveal a screen which could be used as digital picture frame as well as had access to YouTube...

I was listening to my wireless headphones while the dentist was working on my teeth.

He needed to tell me something so he pulled out my earbud.

It was a Bluetooth extraction.

Implantable Headphones

The past few years, people have been circulating articles saying that we'll all have to get chip implants under Obamacare. They reference the book of Revelation and say it's the mark of the beast. But I got to thinking; in-ear headphones get annoying and over-ears aren't that portable. So in the fut...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yo mama jokes

Yo mama so stupid that when saw a bus full of white kids she said "Stop that twinkie!!".

Yo mama so dumb that she went to the dentist to get a bluetooth.

Yo mama so stupid that when she heard that there was a serial killer on the loose, she hid all of her cherios.

Yo mama so fat...

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