To the guy who stole my antidepressants...

I hope you are happy now

To the person who stole my bag with my antidepressants, my glasses and my Microsoft office CD in.

I hope your happy, I will find you, I have contacts, you have my word.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Take these antidepressants, they’ll make everything give you as much pleasure as sex does

And it’s true!

I still don’t get pleasure from anything but now I don’t from sex as well

Did you hear about the man who accidentally took laxatives instead of his antidepressants?

He felt empty inside

Last weekend, I tried throwing an orgy for people on antidepressants...

But nobody came

Earlier today six dwarfs stole my antidepressants.

Not Happy.

After my retirement at the company I worked at for 50 years, I looked forward to some relaxation time and putting my feet up, but my wife had other ideas...

... she insisted I take her to the local shopping centre every day.

Like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and out.

She's like most women - loves to browse & leaves me with endless time to fulfill.

Yesterday my dear wife received the following let...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man gets diarrhea and decides to ask for help to his neighbor who happens to be a doctor.

He crosses the road and rings to the door.
The neighbor welcomes him in:

“Hey, how are you? Sorry if I’m in a hurry but I need to leave in half an hour and I’m still packing. Do you need anything?”

“Oh, I didn’t know, sorry to bother you, I just wanted to ask for advice really quick...

Well, they say money can’t buy you happiness...

But money can buy my antidepressants!

I started out with $20 in my pocket, and if i had a dollar for everytime someone told me I'd be a huge success...

I'd have $5, the antidepressants cost fifteen

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man has been getting chronic headaches...

...and after seeing specialist after specialist, one finally determines that the cause comes from his testicles being compressed. Unfortunately, the specialist tells him that the only solution at this time is to remove his testicles, or else he'll just continue having horrible headaches.

The ...

10 best one-liners from the 2019 Edinburgh fringe

**"I keep randomly shouting out 'Broccoli' and 'Cauliflower' - I think I might have Florets".**

The gag won 41% of the vote.

## Best of the rest

Ten jokes made the 2019 shortlist. Here are the next nine:

* "Someone stole my antidepressants. Whoever they are, I hope they'r...

Hope you're happy

Have been going through a rough patch and someone thought it would be a good idea to steal my antidepressants.

Whoever you are, I hope you're happy.

I didn't have any candy at Halloween...

So I gave out my antidepressants.

It made the kids happy, but it was a real downer for me.

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