UPJOKE
appendicitisdiverticulitisabdomenpaincolicstomachachebellyachechest painacheconstipationpleurodyniagastritisgastroenteritissymptomneuralgia

Abdominal Pain Jokes

I went to the library to check out a medical book on abdominal pain

but when I got it home, I found that someone had ripped out the appendix.

One day, a woman is having abdominal pains.

She visits a doctor, fearing that she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes back to the room.

He tells her, "Well, I sure hope you like changing diapers."

Sighing, she says, "So I assume I'm having a baby?"







"No...you have bowel cancer....

A man who is well-known for overindulging at elaborate dinners is feeling abdominal pain and goes to his doctor. He asks, "Doc, is it my appendix?"

The doctor replies "No, I think it is more like your table of contents."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Intestinal worm-- long. Very long.

Man has horrible abdominal pain and weight loss. The wife finally convinces him to see a doctor.
He's diagnosed with an intestinal worm and is given treatments but it doesn't work. He sees several more doctors who all diagnose the same thing, an intestinal worm, but none of the treatments are w...

my husband, who works in a funeral home

Early one morning, my husband, who works in a funeral home, woke me, complaining of severe abdominal pains. We rushed to the emergency room, where they gave him a series of tests to determine the source of the pain.

My husband decided not to have me call in sick for him until we knew what was...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I almost punched my doctor

When I told him I had abdominal pain he said I was full of shit.

Turns out I am badly constipated.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

At the doctors office

I went to the doctors office due to a strange abdominal pain. My doctor adviced me to stop masturbating. "Is it dangerous?" I asked. "No", said the doctor " but it disturbs my concentration".

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Man who could only Drink Milk

I know an old man who had lived a life full of adventure, but his health started to catch up with him. He'd run the Boston Marathon, was an avid surfer, and climbed Everest, but he'd started to have abdominal pains around his 85th birthday and went to see a doctor. Sadly, he ultimately was diagnosed...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Magic Cheese

"Your blood pressure and cholesterol are too high for a 30 year old." The Doctor said to David. "You need to lose some weight and soon. You are sweating too much and your stool samples look a little too loose. In fact, you have the early stages of dysentery due to the terrible things you eat. I'm go...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.