Oreos Jokes

So much better with milk.

Customer: Excuse me, do you have new Lady Gaga Oreos?

Employee: I'm sorry, we only have the Cardi B ones.

Customer: What's that like?

Employee: Soggy. It's a wet-ass cookie.

Did you know that Gandhi used to have hot young women sleep naked in his bed with him? The idea was that he could conquer his baser desires and prove his self-control by abstaining from sex with them.

I tried a similar thing by leaving half a box of Double Stuff Oreos on my counter, and I gue... read more

It doesn't help with the sex, but my Oreos don't go all soft anymore.

Grandpa cracks open a beer. The boy asks for a sip. “Can your dick touch your ass?” asks Grandpa.
“Well, no,” says the boy.
“Then no.”
Later, Grandpa lights a cigar. “Can I try?” asks the boy.
“Can your dick touch your ass?”
“No,” says the boy.
“Then no.”
After dinner, th... read more

A woman goes to the grocery store. It's a regular Saturday afternoon. At the end of the shopping she goes to the cashier.

She puts following items on the conveyor belt: pepper, cucumber, salami, ham, cheese and Oreos.

The cashier scanns the items and asks: "madam, are you single?".
... read more

Bad Lil' Johnny headed out on the water with his Grandpa for a day of fishing. After awhile of fishing, Grandpa got thirsty so he pulled out a beer and began to drink. Bad Lil' Johnny became curious never having tasted beer before and asked if he could have a sip of Grandpa's beer. Grandpa replie... read more

A young boy is visiting his grandfather one day and sees him smoking a large cigar.
The boy asks "Can I have a puff of that cigar, Grandpa?"
In return the blunt grandfather asks "Can your dick touch your ass, son?"
"No sir"
"Then no cigar for you."
The next day, the boy sees his gran... read more