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Musket Jokes

What do musketeers have in common with lonely lumberjack?

They both come in trees.

My brother plays soccer for a team called the Musketeers

They've started the season well with three wins and a draw, all 4-1 and one 4 all.

Elon's favorite gun.

Elon musket

Perry was busy building a defensive palisade around the Musketeer compound, but it was leaning over badly.

Suddenly Porthos spots the enemy and yells 'Attack! Perry, REPOST!'

What's a mathematician's favorite candy bar?

*N* Musketeers, where *N* = 3!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Pirate walks into his local tavern.

He has just returned from a long venture out at sea and hasn’t been there for a while.

The bartender sees him and immediately screams, “Holy hell, what happen to your leg?”

Pirate: “What do you mean?”

Bartender: “What do I mean?! you got a piece of wood where your leg was...

How many ears did Alexandre Dumas have?

Five. A left ear, a right ear, and three musketeers.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If you're on a majestic stallion

If you're on a majestic stallion, chasing after a grizzly bear with your musket loaded, ready to fire, neither gaining nor losing the other, and as you turn your back you see a ferocious lion in hot pink, ready to take you down.....


You should seriously get your drunk of that carousel...

If Elon Musk was a Brexiteer...

He would be a Musketeer!

The Navy captain was approached by his lieutenant.

“Captain! There is an enemy ship incoming! They are armed with cannons and a hundred men with muskets and swords!”

“Very well,” said the Captain. “Fetch me my red shirt.”

“Why your red shirt, sir?”

“Because if I am wounded in the fight, the blood will be hidden by the shirt, a...

“I’ve been taking night courses for five months now, and I have an exam next week.” Said my neighbor Mike.

Mike: “For example, do you know who Euclid is?”

Me: “No.”

Mike: “He is the father of geometry. If you take night courses you would know this.”

The next day the same discussion took place:

Mike: “Do you know who Alexander Dumas is?”

Me: “No.”

Mike: “He is the...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Frenchman, Spaniard and an American are exploring the wild west...

During their adventures they are taken hostage by a band of Indians. The Indians tell them that they are going to kill them and use their skins to make canoes, but if they wish they may kill themselves in a manner of their choosing as to retain their dignity, and die with honor. The Spaniard seeing ...

Kids

A first grade teacher had twenty-five students in her class and she presented each child in her class the first half of a well known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It's hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you....

Skin Canoes

Three men were exploring the deepest part of an african jungle. The come across a cannibalistic tribe that tied them to stakes and began a bonfire.

The chief walked up to the men and said,
"Three things happen tonight. First, you will die. Second, you will be eaten and your bones licked cl...
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