My wife said that I should get in touch with my feminine side.

So I crashed the car.

Then I ignored her all day for no reason.

My wife told me to try and be more in touch with my feminine side.

I got four speeding tickets and totaled the car.

It seems that today you either have to dress like a masculine motor king or a feminine flower queen; I wish there was a middle ground.

A daisy duke if you will.

Jokes about Feminine Hygiene are the lowest form of humor

Period.

What do you call a feminine hygiene product from the 1800's?

A Period Pad

Her: I like a guy who's in touch with his feminine side

Me: (trying to impress her) I'm on my period

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Cameltoe is feminine...

With the masculine form mooseknuckles. What is the feminine form of sausage fest?

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Did you hear about the feminine hygiene spray SSY?

It takes the PU out of pussy.

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While in town today I saw a homeless woman and I remembered seeing something on facebook about giving them feminine products instead of money.

Feeling suddenly very generous I rushed into Boots and two minutes later presented the homeless woman with a carrier bag.

She thanked me, looked in the bag and with tears in her eyes asked me.


"Where the fuck am I going to plug an iron in?"

As a man i avoid wearing pink shirts or anything too feminine ..

thats why my bra and panties are always black.

All feminine hygiene products now on sale for HALF PRICE

But hurry - it's just for the Christmas period.

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[nsfw] Totally legit, but you can use a joke if you want to.

**Scene:** I was living in an apartment complex where all the bedroom windows faced into a small courtyard of sorts, walled on three sides with 3 stories of bedroom windows. None of the apartments in this complex have air-conditioning. It's close to midnight, December in Sydney AUS, it's a hot humid...

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Another fancy dress party joke [NSFW]

Three Italian mobsters are invited to the Don's costume party. The Don isn't your typical Don, though. He has been seeing a shrink lately, and to help his goons get in touch with their emotions he's asked them all to dress as an emotion.

Not wanting to disappoint the Don, the goons go out of ...

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My Dad's Best Joke - Not a dad joke

My dad was enjoying a smoke break during an in-service training at the police academy. He had taken to smoking Misty cigarettes. A friend from a neighboring police force asked him why he was smoking such a feminine cigarette.

"Well, Kay went out to get something out of my cruiser the other da...

A German, a Frenchman, an Englishman and a Brazilian appreciate the picture of Adam and Eve in Paradise.

German comments:



"Look at what perfection of bodies: she, slender and haired; he, with his athletic body, his profiled muscles. They must be Germans."



Frenchman replies:



"I don't believe it. The eroticism from the figures is evident! She, so feminine, he,...

Aerosmith

According to fellow band members, Aerosmith's Steven Tyler handles a pen very femininely. Rumour has it he doodles like a lady.

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A woman was at the checkout line at the grocery store...

She started to unload her basket. 6 items were all that she was getting. Some feminine products, some snacks, and some tanning oil. A man, visibly drunk walks up and stands behind her in line. He puts a case of beer and a bottle of whiskey on the conveyor. She notices the man looking at her and tur...

A blonde is about to solve a crossword...

... but still misses some answers.

She asks for a help her best friend,

"Jane, could you help me solving this pls. - the clue says 'Feminine intercourse part' - with 4 letters.."

"Across or down?" asks her friend.

"It's across"

"Then it should be lips"

I want to get one of those LA hats everyone has nowadays

When people go to ask me "hey man, are you from Los Angeles?"

I'll be like "nah dude,I just really like the french feminine definite article"

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