“I’m sorry,” the doctor says, “you have rare and very contagious disease. We must quarantine you and you’ll only be fed cheese and bologna.” “Will that cure me?” the patient asks.

“Well, no,” the doctor replies, “but it’s the only food that will fit under the door.”

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Remember, it's only real bologna if it comes from the Bologna region in a Italy.

Otherwise, it's just sparkling pig anus.

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A lady who is cheating on her husband

There's a lady who is cheating on her husband. One day while they are having sex she hears her husband pull into the driveway. Her boyfriend says "oh no! What should we do?!" She says "hurry! Get dressed and go to the living room!" Once they're in the living room she starts sprinkling baby powder al...

What is the best kind of meat to put on your shins?

Bologna

Dumb blond male.

There are three construction workers, a Mexican, an African American & a blond Caucasian. When lunch time comes, the construction workers are sitting on a steel beam 30 stories high about to enjoy their food.

The blond opens his lunchbox and is angered to find yet another bologna &...

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I woke up this morning at 9:30, made coffee, stepped out for the day's first cigarette, and was greeted by a gorgeous spring day. The sun was shining the birds were singing...

Then I ripped ass like a bologna windmill slapping a tile floor.

How do you make friends with a meat sandwich?

You tell it a bunch of bologna

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Three men on their lunch break *LONG*

Three men were working together on the 40th floor construction of the Empire State Building.
An American, an Italian, and a Canadian.

A loud horn is heard signifying lunch, and all three men sat together, on the edge, their feet dangling a hundreds of feet in the air.

The American o...

What do you call the meat on your lower leg?

Bologna

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Some jokes never get old... (Not mine)

Some jokes just NEVER get old LMAO

An Irishman, a Mexican and a blond guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building. They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, "Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch I'm going to ...

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The 3 Construction Workers

3 construction workers are sitting on the edge of a high rise they're helping to build, having lunch.

The first one, Alfredo, opens his lunchbox to find spaghetti.
"Mama Mia! Itsa spaghetti again! Ifa I see more spaghetti tomorrow, I'ma gonna jump off anda die!"

The next one, Jua...

Once upon a time three guys went hiking

By nightfall they ran out of food they all notice that there's one slice of bologna left, so they all decided go to sleep for the night and whoever wakes up the next morning with the best dream will get the last slice of bologna.

The next morning came and all the guys woke up, so the first g...

Two hobos get together at the end of the day to see how much money they have.

Hobo 1: "I only have 1 dollar, what are we going to do?"

Hobo 2: " I have nothing. Okay, let's buy a Bologna sausage and then go to a bar, I have an idea."

So they buy a bologna sausage and go to a bar and drink a couple of beers on the tab. They have a great time, but it's getting qui...

3 men on construction site

3 men are on a construction site of a highrise during lunch

1st guy opens up his lunch box and sees a ham sandwich. He says "ham ham ham that's all I get. If I get another ham sandwich I'm jumping off this building and killing myself."

2nd guy opens up his lunch box and sees a turkey ...

What does your shin taste like?

Bologna

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3 guys having lunch on a high rise construction site.

As they open their lunchboxes

1st guy says. Bologna sandwich again! If my wife packs me another bologna sandwich tomorrow I'm jumping off this high rise and killing myself.

2nd guy opens his lunch up. Ham and cheese again! If my wife packs me this lunch again I'll jump with ya!
...

An Italian, a Mexican and a Newfie...

are working steel on a high rise 30 stories up in the air. At lunch time they all sit down on one of the beams and open their lunch pails. The Italian opens his and says "Mama mia not pizza again! If I get pizza one more time I swear I'm going to jump to my death.
Next the Mexican opens his lunch...

A group of construction workers, an Irishmen, a Mexican, and a Blonde are sitting on the 24th floor of a construction building...

The Irishman says "corn beef cabbage again, I swear to God if i get corn beef cabbage again I'm gonna jump from this roof"

The Mexican man says "tacos and beans, goddamnit, I swear to god if I get tacos and beans one more time I'm gonna jump from this roof"

The Blonde man says "bologna...

Three construction workers are sitting down for lunch on the roof.....

The first construction workers says, "I swear to god if my wife packed me another bologna sandwich I'm going to kill my self by jumping off this roof." He opens his lunch and there is a bologna sandwich. He goes and jumps off the roof.

The second construction worker says, "If my wife packed ...

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Three construction workers are eating lunch on a beam of a 50 story building...

First guy looks in his lunch box. "Tuna again. If I have to eat this shit one more time, I'm gonna kill myself."

Second guy looks in his lunch box. "Egg salad again. If I gotta eat this shit one more time, I'm gonna kill myself, too."

Third guy looks in his lunch box. "Goddamn bologna....

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An Italian man, a Mexican man and an American man are all sitting on a steel beam a couple hundred feet in the air.

Working as construction workers they all pull out thier lunches one at a time and the italian man is first to react:

"Damn. Spaghetti and meatballs again. I swear, if my wife makes spaghetti and meatballs for me one more time I'm going to jump off this beam to my death."

The Mexican is...

Three construction workers are sitting down to lunch...

They each bring their lunches to to the top of the building.

The first worker says, "Turkey, turkey, turkey. If I have turkey one more time, I'm gonna jump off of this building." He opens his lunch box and finds turkey, so he jumps to his death.

The second worker says, "Tuna, tuna, tun...

Three bridge security guards are sitting down to eat lunch...

The unpack their lunches. The first one has a bologna sandwich, the second has a PB&J sandwich, and the third has a ham and cheese sandwich. The next day, they have the same sandwiches again. This continues for many days until one day they are sick of it. They decide that if they don't get somet...

Italian, Ukrainian and Newfie on a Lunch Break..

An Italian, a Ukrainian and a Newfie high-rise construction worker were all up on a huge building about to have lunch. They all took a seat and opened up their lunch boxes;

"Mama mia!" Said the Italian "Mya wife! She always give-a me meat-a-balls! If I get meat-a-balls in my lunch tomorrow, I...

[long] Another blond guy joke...

Three best friends worked in construction together on the same crew. They were working on the 20th floor of a building when they stopped for their lunch break. They sat on the edge of the building, legs dangling over the edge, enjoying the view as they ate their lunches.
Guido opened his lunch ...

A man walked into a butchery that specialized in exotic meats.

...he immediately began browsing the shelves, but to his surprise, all he could find were ground-pork sausages. He approached the butcher.

"I thought you were supposed to have rare and exotic meats!" He shouted.

"We do," replied the butcher, "look around you."

The man glanced ar...

What did Jeffrey Dahmer sing as he went to the refrigerator?

My Bologna had a first name.

A guy claims to have made a 20 lb hotdog

A butcher says “ah, that’s bologna”

Two guys walk into a sandwich shop...

The 1st guy says, "I'll take the BLT on sourdough, please."

"One BLT coming right up!" Says the sandwich maker.

The second guy looks at the sandwich maker and says "I'll have a Donald Trump."

Confused, the sandwich maker asks, "A Donald Trump, what's that?"

In which the t...

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Three construction workers were having lunch on a high rise..

The first worker opens up his lunchbox and says, are you kidding me? Another bologna sandwich! Every day its bologna! If I get another bologna sandwich i'm going to jump off this high rise! The second worker opens his lunch box and says, yeah i'm with you man I cant take anymore of this! The third w...

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An Englishman, a Scot, and an Irishman are all eating lunch together.

The Englishman says, "I hate bologna! If I get bologna one more time, I'm going to kill myself!"

The Scot says, "I hate ham! If I get ham one more time, I'll kill myself, too!"

The Irishman says, "I hate peanut butter! If I get peanut butter one more time, I'll do the same thing!"
<...

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A Black man, a Mexican and a Polish man are at a construction site

A Black man, a Mexican and a Polish man are at a construction site having lunch. The black man opens up his lunch and says "If I get fried chicken for lunch again, I'm going to jump off this building." The Mexican opens up his lunch and says "If I get a burrito for lunch again, I'm going to jump off...

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