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Aura Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

According to ancient Japanese lore, a person’s aura takes a particular colour right before they die.

Cyan Aura.

So my bedroom was filled with a demonic aura

I called in the local exorcist. When he entered my bedroom, I told him

"Get the hell out of here"

A man goes to pray to a statue of an angel at his church

"Please, please, please, let me win the lottery"

Then at least twice a day, if not more often, he goes to church, kneels for the statue and prays:

"Please, please, please, let me win the lottery"

Then, after years of this, a miracle! The statue springs to life in an aura of ligh...

What do you call a bright light around your ringhole?

An Aura-fice

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A big, tough guy walks into a bar...

Immediately seeing his massive muscles, and overall dangerous aura, everyone hushes and just stares.

"Listen punks," he growls out. "I run this bar now, and you guys are going by my rules! Everyone on the left side is an incest loving hillbilly, and everybody on the right side is a raging hom...

The Secret

A very depressed and distraught man goes in to see a psychiatrist.

"I've had it with everything. With my job, my wife, my kids, everything. I just can't cope or deal with anything anymore. I don't want to be on pills, or spend a fortune on therapy. I've just had enough." he says.

T...

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