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Umpteenth Jokes

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A 35 year old virgin, fed up with constant dating failures,

goes to see his doctor, for the umpteenth time. Fed up with the constant complaints, his doctor finally relents.

"Ok ok. There's a new guy in town, from Hong Kong. Chinese. Relationship specialist. I think he's a quack but it's worth a try." Says his doc and gives him the address.

Th...

The Blonde and the Earbuds

A blonde regularly sits in the office with a pair of earbuds in. Because of this, she regularly doesn't hear her boss. One day, the boss calls out to her, and for the umpteenth time the blonde doesn't hear him. Fed up, the boss stomps over to her desk, rips off her earphones and begins to yell at he...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An American walks into a pub in Ireland

...he sits down next to an old, mangled Irishman who is clearly on his umpteenth drink of the afternoon.

As the American orders a beer, the Irishman leans over to him and says:

> What’d ya think of this bar, young man?

“It’s nice.” The American says, nonplussed. He just wan...

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