Hand Gesture Jokes - 14 Hilarious Hand Gesture Jokes

The cashier at the Hand Gestures Store told me they were having a sale on slaps today.

So I told him, "Give me five!"

Today I learned Italians have more than 250 specific hand gestures to communicate non-verbally, I asked my German friend if they had anything like it in Germany..

He said they have one but they are not allowed to use it

On my jog today, I saw this little old lady talking to her cat. From her hand gestures and body language it was clear she thought the cat understood her. I hope I never get that lonely and senile.

Anyway...I went home and told my dog about her. We laughed and laughed..

A husband and wife go to church every Sunday. However, the husband would always fall asleep while church was in session.

One day the wife went to the priest and said “My husband always falls asleep, and I can’t see when he does, so whenever he does can you make a hand gesture so I will know to wake him up?” The priest agrees and the preaching starts.

As priest is saying “Who is thy ruler and maker, who will alw...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A cop pulled over a bloke for speeding....

He goes up to the bloke and says

>And where do you think you're going at that speed this early in the morning.

The driver replies

>I'm going to work

To which the officer replies

>And what job requires you to get there this quick?

The driver thinking...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A soldier was standing guard next to a river in a remote area

A man trekking through the wilderness saw the soldier.

Surprised to see anyone, he called across to ask what he was doing there, but the soldier didn't respond.

It was a wide river, so maybe the soldier couldn't hear him. He decided to try using hand gestures to communicate instead.<...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two friends, Bob and Sam, are bored are sitting around the house. Bob asks Sam do you want to play a game?

**NOTE: This joke only really works in person and told to a group of people. **

Sam says "Ok, what's the game?"

Bob replies, "I'll blind fold you and put something up your butt and you have to guess what it is."

Sam hesitantly says, "umm ok" and puts a blind fold on and drops h...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Hammer time

John the ranch hand is told to team up with Annie the young college girl helping out over the summer. They have been meanding fences in the foothills for a few days so they've got a donkey with them with a tool pack and supplies strapped on its back since the terrain is too rough to get a vehicle ...

This awesome new TV automatically set subtitles to Italian for my Italian girlfriend

I guess the CIA picked up on her hand gestures.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Rich guy in a high end bar.

So a very wealthy man walks into a bar he frequents due to the fact it's only for the most wealthy patrons. One night he goes in and he notices the most beautiful woman he has ever seen decked out in the finest diamonds mixed with other precious gemstones throughout. He approached her and buys her a...

Two nurses are working at a children's hospital.

While they are checking on their patients, out of nowhere a man wearing doctor's clothing and sporting long hair and a beard shuffles into the ward. Without saying anything to the nurses, he moves around the room, healing all the kids with a few words and hand gestures. He then just as quickly leave...

New to the country, and not knowing a word of English, Con the Greek got a job at a fruit stand.

The manager told him:

"Look, there are only 3 phrases you need to know:"

If they say "How much are the mangoes?" You say "$5 a kilo"

If they ask if they're ripe, you say "Some are, some aren't"

If they say they don't want to buy, you shrug and say "If you don't, someone e...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Ceasefire broken!

Once upon a time Sweden and Norway was at war, The war was getting pretty bad for both sides so they decided to have a ceasefire.

At the front line there were 2 watchtowers, 1 on each side of the border and there was one Norwegian and one Swedish solider on watch out duty on each side of th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A rabbi and the Pope have a religious debate

Several of the Pope's officials are concerend about the growing Jewish population in Rome, so the encourage the Holy Father to set up a religious debate with the head Rabbi. If the Rabbi loses, he must leave Rome. If he wins, they can stay.

However, the Rabbi doesn't speak Italian or Latin an...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.