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Bear Arms Jokes

In the USA you can bear arms

In mother Russia we arm bears

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It makes sense that the Right to Bear Arms is the 2nd amendment

If the 1st amendment is, “I should be able to say whatever the fuck I want”

Then it makes sense that the founding fathers said, “Oh ya, I should probably have a gun too”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Englishman, an American and a Japanese guy are on a boat, moments away from plunging over a waterfall to their doom...

Suddenly a genie appears. The genie explains that he is of limited power. He cannot prevent their inevitable deaths, but he can grant each man one wish before he dies.

The American steps up first. 'I love my country. Before I die I want to sing my national anthem one last time. The full versi...

"The Constitution says I have the right to bear arms," I told the officer

and he said, "where's the rest of the bear?"

I thought we had the right to bear arms

but when I got them I was arrested for animal abuse

An Englishman goes on a hunting tour of the Americas. He first stops in Canada, where he shoots a large male grizzly bear

In order to ease the transportion of his trophy, the Englishman cuts the bear into pieces, seperating the legs, the arms and head from the torso. He then continues his tour southward crossing the border into the USA.

At the border a customs agent checks his belongings. "Sir," says the agent "...

Came up with a Joke, thought I'd share

As the title says, here's a Joke I came up with, it works better when talking then in text form, but I still say it's alright.
So, in 1832, an American who had moved to Ontario had been hunting wild game.

Now, he hadn't bothered with the paper work for a license, as he thought it was rem...

First trip to the USA

My friend and I visited the USA. We landed at LAX and after an epoch, we cleared Homeland Security and got our luggage.

My friend immediately pulled out a pair of brown, furry, shoulder length gloves and pulled them on. I stared at him. He looked ridiculous - the gloves even had claws. ...

George W Bush, Barack Obama, and Trump all die and go to heaven.

Upon arriving, God asks them respectively what they believe in.

Bush said he believes in American exceptionalism, the right to bear arms, and the free market.

God said alright, you can take this seat to my right.

Obama said he believes in everyone having Healthcare, equal rights...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I've been over eighteen for a few years now.

Where the fuck are my bear arms?

A man from the US goes to the Canadian Rockies in order to hike.

However, he encounters a grizzly bear. He is instantly frightened. By some miracle, he manages to survive, and decides to keep the bear claws as a trophy. Finished with his hike, he decides to go back to the US. As he drives to the border, he realizes that he needs to hide the claws in fear of poach...

When i got my gun license, first thing i did was cut off a bear’s front legs. No legal action was taken

Because i had the right to bear arms

An American patriot with amputated arms decides to replace them.

He obtains a pair of grizzly bear arms from a black market, and attaches them on his own, with the help of a friend.

He is arrested for contribution to animal cruelty and performing medical procedures unlicensed.

When taken to court, he gives a speech defending his right to bear arms.

A police officer was driving through an empty freeway in the woods one day, when he stumbled upon the corpse of a large animal laying on the side of a road...

A police officer was driving through an empty freeway in the woods one day, when he stumbled upon the corpse of a large animal laying on the side of a road, with a pickup truck parked nearby.

He parked his car, opened the door, and looked at the animal, a grizzly bear, with some of its limbs ...

I was playing Arms on my Nintendo Switch and my teacher told me to put it away.

"But I have the right to bear Arms!"

Pretty sure Betsy DeVos said the grizzly metaphor because the 2nd amendment says,

The right to bear arms.

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