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Bavarian Jokes

How many Bavarians does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One of them to actually change it and the other to hold their beer.

An American, An Englishman, and A Bavarian walk into a bar

The American orders a bud, the Englishman a pint of ale.
The Bavarian orders a coke and says to the others:
"If you won't drink beer, I won't either."

Bad car acronyms. I know a few, you got others?

Ford => Found On Road Dead. ... ... or ... ... First On Race Day. (Depends if you're a fan)

Fiat => Fix It Again Tony

BMW => Bavarian Money Waster

Subaru => backwards is U R A Bus

Chevrolet => acronym for all the engine problems to expect... Cracked ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This [long] joke always cracked me up..

My grandpa was stationed in Germany after the war. And when I was very small he told me about this little restaurant that served THE best Bavarian cream pie. Apparently he went there every opportunity he had. He couldn't get enough of that Bavarian cream pie - it was absolutely unreal.

Well, ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Bavarian cream pie (from comedians in cars getting coffee)

A soldier in World War II is in Germany at the end of the war and eats a piece of bavarian cream pie at a cafe. It's the best thing he's ever tasted.

He goes on about his life. Gets married, has a family, raises children, retires. His wife dies. He gets diagnosed with cancer. He has a few m...

What do you call uncivilized donuts?

Bavarians

Why is Alzheimer's better than Parkinson's?

Because it's no big deal to forget a beer but a tragedy to spill a beer.

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That's Bavarian dark humor for you.

There is some doubt about the nationality of Ötzi the Iceman.

He can't have been Italian, because he was carrying tools. He can't have been Austrian or Bavarian, because he had brains. He may have been Swiss, because he was run over by a glacier. But most likely he was a northern German, because who else would go hiking in the mountains while wearing sandals?

An Irish, a British, and American soldiers...

...had just helped each other escape from an Axis prisoner camp in WW2 Germany. As they run through the Bavarian forest, they hear alarms sounding, and soon afterwards, they hear dogs barking and guards yelling to each other.

The barking and yelling gets louder and louder, and the escapees r...

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