This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This joke got me fired when I worked as a cook. Credit goes to Jackie “The Joke Man” Martling

A husband goes to his wife and says “You’re either going hunting with me, sucking my cock or I’m fucking you in the ass. I’m gonna go get the dogs ready and I’ll be back for your answer.”

After a bit of time, he returns to his wife who defiantly says to him “I’m not going hunting and there’s...

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Freudian Slip

A guy is talking with his buddy and says I've been making alot of Freudian slips lately. The other day I was at the train station and there was a beautiful woman behind the ticket window with huge breasts. Instead of asking for a ticket to Pittsburgh I asked for a picket to Tittsburg.

Wow, sa...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Freudian Slip (possibly NSFW)

Two friends were chatting it up, as friends often do, when one brings up Freudian Slips. He says, ”The craziest thing happened to me the other day. I was going to the big game with my son, and we finally got up to the ticket window. You would not believe the size of the tits on the lady working the ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Freudian slip

A man was waiting in line to buy a train ticket for himself and his friend. When he was almost to the front of the line, he noticed that the person selling the tickets had a rather nice, large pair of breasts. When it was his turn to buy the tickets, he accidentally blurted out "Two pickets for Titt...

I always cry at the same point in the movies.

Right at the ticket window.

A guy brings his pet duck with him to the movies.

The ticket seller tells him "You cant bring a duck in here, sir!"

The man, feeling dissapointed, walks away with his duck.

He thinks "Maybe I can sneak him in!"

So the guy takes his duck and stuffs him into his pants and returns to the ticket window to buy his ticket.

...

A man went to the movie..

A man went to the movie theater's ticket window a second time and said, "One more."

"For The Hobbit?" the ticket vendor asked.

"No," the man replied, "That's my girlfriend."

Accountants on a train (long)

Three lawyers and three accountants stood in line to buy tickets for a train ride to the city. The three accountants bought only one ticket between them, while the three lawyers bought one ticket each.

After the men got on the train, one of the lawyers asked one of the accountants, “Why did y...

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