UPJOKE
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Sun: Greg, Mon: Ian, Tue: Greg, Wed: Ian, Thur: Greg, Fri: Ian, Sat: Greg

It's the Gregorian calendar.

Mon, Tues, Weds, Thurs, Fri, Sat, Sun.

That might sound weird, but it's just a bit of everyday speech.

A Glasgow girl goes to the Civic Center to register for child benefit.

"How many children?" asks the civil servant?

"10" replies the girl.

"10???" says the civil servant.. "What are their names?"

"Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec and.....eh...Alec

"Doesn't that get confusing?" "

Naw..." says the girl "its great bec...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A young man joined the British Navy in the 1600s

After being shown around the ship and told he'd be at sea for many months, he asked the Captain, "What does a man do to relieve his urges?"

The Captain said, "Well, there's a barrel lashed to the mast and it has a hole in it. You can make use of it Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, Saturday...

Always give 100% at work.

Mon - 11%
Tues - 24%
Wed - 40%
Thurs - 23%
Fri - 2%

My Irish stepfather was a master story teller. He told the Wembley joke differently than what I've seen online.

Excuse me, is this Wembley?
No it's Thursday.
So am I let's have one.

He paid particular attention to the beat changes in this story. At the end of each line (the beat) he would change voices. Each line was a different voice/character. He told the story as if it was a fast paced con...

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