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Talk Like A Pirate Jokes

Talk Like A Pirate Day

Q: What does a dyslexic pirate say?
A: RRRRRRA!

Wife: Okay. Here’s what’s got to change. I’m sick of you saying I talk like a pirate and you never buy me flowers!

Husband: I never knew you sold flowers!

it's international Talk Like A Pirate Day! enjoy a cross-re-post.

What's a Pirate's favourite letter?

You'd think it'd be r, but a pirate's first love is the C.

For talk like a pirate day

There was a famous pirate captain who before a battle would turn to his ensign and say
“Fetch me me red shirt”
After the battle was won the ensign asked
“ Why the red shirt captain?”
“ If I get shot or wounded the shirt will hide the blood and the crew won’t be alarmed”
A month lat...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

In honor of Talk Like a Pirate Day

Here's my favorite pirate joke:

When I was 17, I went on a class trip to a beach but I snuck away to explore on my own. I went into this bar. It had nautical stuff on the wall, a bunch of shark jaws, but also streamers and balloons about the place. It looked like there was a party going on. ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

In honor of Talk Like a Pirate Day

I hadn't spoken like a pirate all day, but I work in the ER for mental health and thought it appropriate today to tell the following joke. (An old one of some of you, I'm sure.)





A pirate walks into a bar with nothing but a steering wheel on his dick. The bartender asks,
...

It's Talk Like A Pirate Day, so...

"Hey, we all knew this would be a rebuilding year, we'll do some conditioning this fall, have a strong spring, and come back next year with a good run for the post-season."

Given that it be Talk Like A Pirate Day, I be havin' a story about me parrot!

Back when I were just a young sea-dog, I found meself sailin' under the iron grip o' Captain Nobeard. A fearsome pirate, was she, known fer cuttin' down anyone who crossed her!

Well, being a new pirate, I figured I'd be needin' a parrot fer me shoulder. Picked one out, did I, in the first por...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Since it's National Talk Like a Pirate Day, here you go

A pirate walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened, you look terrible!"

"Arrh – Not at ‘tall." the pirate replies, "I be fine." The bartender says, "But what about that wooden leg? You didn't have that before."

"Arrh!," says the pirate,...

It's National Talk Like A Pirate Day; so what did one sailor say to the other when he yelled 'Land Ahoy!'

arrr ye shore

Stolen From Another Reddit (I Think) In Honor of Talk Like A Pirate Day

There once was a pirate (the story relates)

who thought he could rhumba on skates.

He fell on his cutlass

which rendered him nutless

and virtually useless on dates.

In honor of September 19th, what are your best pirate jokes?

September 19th is international talk like a pirate day, and I would love to hear all of your guys best pirate jokes. Here is mine:

Why do pirates have trouble learning the alphabet?
Because they spend years at Sea!

How do pirates know they're pirates?

They think, therefore they AAAARRR.

My dad just told me that and I laughed. So dumb but it's Talk Like A Pirate Day.

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Talk like a pirate day

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