UPJOKE
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Everyone keeps saying Aaron Rodgers only had 4 snaps with the Jets.....

Its 5 if you count the Achilles ( I'm so sorry jets fans )

I don’t know why Jets fans are so mad at Aaron Rodgers. Saying he screwed their entire season

Obviously he’s just into four play

Will Rodgers joke

If Pro is the opposite of Con,
What is the opposite of Progress?

Aaron Rodgers is now 0-4 against the 49ers in a playoff game…

He’s also 0-3 for his vaccination shots

Why Won't Aaron Rodgers Leave Green Bay?

Because he doesn't want to Take a Shot on another team.

After my retirement from the company I worked at for 45 years, I looked forward to some relaxation time, but my wife had other ideas...

... she insisted I take her to the local shopping centre every day.

Like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and out.

She's like most women - loves to browse & leaves me with endless time to fulfill.

Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter,...

Danika Patrick and Aaron Rodgers officially broke up.

I hear it was because she never finished first.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My Father tells this one at every family get together. (Apologies in advance if that has been posted here already)

So Mrs. Rodgers is a 3rd grade English teacher, and each Monday she gives her students a new vocabulary word. The students' task is to come up with a sentence using the new vocabulary word by the following day. This week the word is "contagious."

So Tuesday morning rolls around and Mrs. Rodg...

Aaron Rodgers is pretty deflated after throwing two picks this game...

If he's not careful, Tom Brady might try to hold him

Aaron Rodgers breaks silence on why he broke up with Danica Patrick

"I felt like I was being rushed."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Kenny Rodgers has a problem. [OC]

Kenny Rodgers is convinced his wife is having an affair with their GP.
Every time she comes back home, she's much more sprightly, excitable and quivers to the touch.
Being a man that's fairly vanilla in the bedroom, seldom trying to spice things up and the missionary position's best friend, he...

Why does Brendon Rodgers hate Twitter?

It only allows 140 characters

What do the Super Bowl and a doctor’s office have in common?

Aaron Rodgers won’t get a shot at either.

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You know you're a Minnesotan Abroad if

You get weird looks if you ask for your pizza to be cut into squares.

You've gotten strange looks when you whipped out your Super America fuel card, your TCF Bank debit card, your Dunn Brothers gift card, or White Castle refillable cup at a gas station.

You're the only one in a t-shirt...

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onomastics, the study of names

Names like Johnson, Smithfield or Rodgers are fairly easy to explain.

I wonder how to explain the name: Dickinson

What’s a horse’s favorite show?

Mr Rodgers’ Nayyy-borhood

INTERVIEWER: Roger Federer, why do you like Switzerland so much?

RODGER FEDERER: Well the flag is a big plus.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A friend told me to try Viagra, he said it'll make me feel like James Bond.

I don't know about that but I can defiantly feel my Rodger Moore.

Two judges were stumbling home from their local pub

Two judges were stumbling home from their local pub, arms around each other, loudly singing Kenny Rodgers.

“Hey," said one, "I think we're drunk."

“You’re right, and according to the law I will have to charge you with being drunk and disorderly. You’ll have to appear before me at 10AM ...

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A man had a bowel problem one day and goes to see his proctologist.

"What seems to be the problem?", asked the doctor

"Well, ever since the Packers got that bad ref call during yesterday's game, my gut has been acting up"

"Bad ref call?" Replied the doctor, while preparing his instruments. "I was watching that game too, but it didn't look bad at all!"<...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Just bought some 007 Viagra

It makes you rodger more

So Danny Ings is about to play his first game for Liverpool...

...Brendan Rodgers says: "We'll give you 45 minutes, then pull you off at half time."
Danny exclaims: "That's brilliant, we only used to get an orange at Burnley"

The gift.

Knowing that the minister had a very sore throat, an elderly woman presented him with a bottle of cherry brandy.

"This is quite soothing,” the woman said, "but please don’t tell anyone I gave you liquor. Everyone thinks I am teetotaler."

"I understand," replied the good man.

...

A C-130 was being deployed from Peterson AFB, Colorado

An hour into the flight, the plane began losing altitude. Acting quickly, the pilot decided it was necessary to airdrop items to be tracked down later in order to reach the nearest airport.

First to go was the Base Commander's new Humvee. Next was a large crate of MREs. Finally, a crate of t...

Satan was severely depressed.

Fewer and fewer souls each new year were coming to hell and it was soon becoming quite empty. So Satan hired an analyst to find out what was going wrong. The analyst traveled all over hell, interviewed lesser demons, and surveyed the experiences of tortured souls, taking notes here and there. A week...

Farming

A city banker gets fed up with his immoral career so sells up and buys a pig farm in Suffolk with his wife.


He moves in and next day goes to buy a few sows and a boar. 'How will I know the sows are pregnant?' he asks the seller.


"Ah, well, the morning after, the sows be lay...

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